Just turned 40, weighing #3 baby

iVillage Member
Registered: 02-26-1999
Just turned 40, weighing #3 baby
Tue, 10-10-2006 - 9:48pm

Howdy -

Just found this board. I turned 40 on 9/2. I'm trying to decide right now if we should try for #3. I LOVE being pregnant, and have an almost 7 year old, an almost 2 year old. It took a bit longer to conceive #2 (about 5 months).

Part of me loves our little family exactly as it is, but another part thinks I have one more baby in me and that we should try again. I like the idea of our little one having a companion...but, part of me is terrified of the increased odds for a baby with "problems," but another part thinks that 20 yo women have babies with "problems" and that God will take care of it and give me the strength to deal with it if it happens (in our family we have 2 babies with "problems" non of which increase our genetic risks, but have made me aware of what a blessing these little people are despite their problems). My OB has said what ever we decide, we should get cracking...

In the last 6 months I've lost 40 pounds, have very regular periods and feel exactly the same as I did at 25 physically...

Anyway, does anyone know what the stats are for a 40 yo conceiving successfully, particularly after having 2 others? And, anyone know where the stats on birth defects can be found for women in our age group?

TIA, and hope you all concieve!

iVillage Member
Registered: 04-08-2005
Tue, 10-10-2006 - 9:56pm

I wouldn't get too overwhelmed by the stats. I can tell you that I had a healthy baby boy 10 months ago. I am 44. He was concieved when I was 42.5, 2 years after my husband had a Vasectomy reversal. My husband's mom had him when she was 42 and my mom had a baby at 41. Hope this helps. Good luck.


Avatar for kfrog606
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-27-2003
Sun, 10-15-2006 - 10:28am

hi there! i conceived #3 at 39. we had decided we wanted a third. our children are 5 years apart, so we had a 10-year old at the time and a 5-year old. it took us a bit longer to conceive (the first two were right away) and we had two miscarriages (one at 12 weeks and one at 8 weeks) all within a few months. we just decided we would give it one more time after the two miscarriages and if it didn't work, then it was our sign that we should be happy with two. well, the third time was the charm and we now have a little boy who just turned three last week. i can't imagine my life without him. my older children adore him and he is especially connected and close to his 13-year old brother. they are inseparable at this time. so, anyone who says older children won't interact with the little ones are wrong in this case. they are best "brother" buddies.

in fact, now at age 42, i would really like to have just one more. i am weighing that decision because we haven't been using protection and it hasn't happened in the past few months. it isn't like we are timing it exactly right though, so we may have to work on that a bit more.

so, my thoughts are to go for it if you are thinking about it. truly, he is just the most loving child and i feel blessed to have him.

hope this helps. email me direct if you have any questions or want to chat.