m/c at age 40, very depressed

iVillage Member
Registered: 05-24-2004
m/c at age 40, very depressed
5
Mon, 05-24-2004 - 6:41pm
I'm new to message boards, so hope I'm doing this right. I just turned 40 & had a miscarraige at 9 weeks of pregnancy. I was very devestated. I also have a 12 year old & a 17 year old. I very much want another baby. From all I have heard, my chances of concieving & having a baby at my age are not good. It has been a month & a half since my m/c, & I am still very depressed. I'm so afraid that was my only chance. Is there any hope? More then what I've been given? What can I do to improve my chances of concieving & having a healthy pregnancy? I feel so helpless. Can anyone help me?
iVillage Member
Registered: 12-26-2003
Mon, 05-24-2004 - 7:40pm
Hi,

Welcome to the board!!!! I am glad you found us!!!! Let me first say how very sorry I am about your M/C. I have been through that as well & know how devastating it is. It is not impossibe for you to maintain a Pg @ this point. Many women in our age group have been successful. You should first have some blood work done. Did you have a D n C & if so did they test the fetus? What were the results? There are many things you can do to improve your chances. I made a post about a month about about Diets & Vitamins. If you have trouble finding it give me a post & I will dig it up for you.

++++++++++++Prayers &++++++++++vibes coming to you!!!!!!!!++++++++++

((((((HUGS))))))

Lisa
Lilypie Baby Days
iVillage Member
Registered: 05-24-2004
Mon, 05-24-2004 - 11:27pm
Thankyou so much for your encouragement & info. Yes I had a D&C, but the fetus to my knowledge was not tested. What type of bloodwork should I ask for? My doctor is very nice & understanding, but was not much help in finding out why this happened to me. He said that it might be because of my age, & that further testing would be very expensive. I've just felt very lost & empty, not knowing where to turn or what to do. He did give me some vitemins called pre-concieve. I've been taking them everyday since. I had my m/c on Easter weekend & my D&C the following week. I did get what I think was a period 3 weeks later. It lasted about 8 days & was very light. I am now trying again. Can I ovulate this soon, 5 1/2 weeks later? Any info you can give me would be so appreciated. Thanks so very much!
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-18-2004
Wed, 05-26-2004 - 7:44pm
I am very sorry to hear about your m/c. I also experienced a m/c at 8 weeks pg and I know how upsetting it is to have to go through that. I also had a D&C because I did not m/c on my own. I guess the encouraging news is that you were able to get pregnant which means that chances are good that you will be able to get pregnant again!!! You might want to see if there was any particular reason why you may have m/c. Check out some of the links I posted to JADU at the top of the board. There is some good information about causes of m/c.

IF you are not charting your cycles then I would encourage you to do so as it will give you some valuable information and let you know if and WHEN you are ovulating. YOu might want to check out www.fertilityfriend.com for free charting. The other thing I would suggest is that you ask your doctor for a blood test on CD2 or CD3 of your cycle to test for FSH/E2 (follicle stimulating hormone and estrodial). Many women m/c early in pregnancy and sometimes it is simply because the embryo was not developing properly. In that case there is not much you can do except to hope for a better egg. You can start TTC again after your next AF. It took me awhile but I finally got pregnant and gave birth to a healthy baby ... and I was 46!!!

Best of luck to you.... Pat

iVillage Member
Registered: 04-09-2004
Wed, 05-26-2004 - 11:34pm
Hi,

I too miscarried and had to have a D & C this past Monday. I have been pregnant 3 times since I turned 40 so it is indeed possible to get pregnant over 40. I suspect that my problem is linked to some immune issues that I am handling right now. i am seeking an RE here in NYC and will do whatever tests are recommended to me. The whole thing seems overwhelming but I am DETERMINED to get through this somehow. I have Epstein Barr/Chronic Fatigue Syndrome that I just found out I had while I was prg. I am now being treated for that.

I wrote to Dr. Alan Beer(he is a very well known immunologist and scientist who has helped many women get pregnant after they have had multiple m/cs) when I was pregnant (his website is www.repro-med.net) on a recommendation from one of the generous ladies on this board. He wrote back to me right away! I did tell him I was over 40 and had been diagnosed with the Epstein Barr/Chronic Fatigue Syndrome and he told me that many of the women who had come to him with recurring m/cs had that.

My recommendation is that you find as many success stories as possible like Pat on this board. She is a huge inspiration to me having had a successful prg at age 46! Also, the doctor I have been seeing for my Epstien Barr had a 53 year old woman get pregnant with her own eggs! She had a very healthy baby.(this was after being on his program for 3 or 4 months)

Seeing an RE is probably the best thing that both of us could do at this point in our lives. They can rule out a lot of things and certainly pinpoint some specific problems that might be seen from the testing.

Where do you live?

All my prayers and thoughts go out to you,

Best wishes and baby dust!

Jadu

iVillage Member
Registered: 05-24-2004
Thu, 05-27-2004 - 6:57pm
Thankyou so much for your info. I've only gotten a few messages back, & have already learned more here then anywhere else. I'm so greatful I found you ladies. I have finely found people that completely understand what I am going through. I thought I was losing my mind. I have been so emotional, & obsessed with having a baby. I have only had 1 m/c, & my heart goes out to you. One was bad enough. I hope & pray for myself & all you ladies who are trying to concieve & have a happy, healthy full pregnancy. I wish I had advice to give in return for what you have given me. I just don't know much yet. I never dreamed I would have a m/c. I had 2 other pregnancies that were fine.

You were asking where I live. I live in Warren PA. I live in a small country town in the woods. I'm about 10 miles from town. We have 1 OB doctor. He is very nice, but not a lot of help. After I had my D&C & check-up, it was all done. He said to call if I need anything. I felt lost. I asked about any testing & he said it was to expensive for me to bother with. I was so hurt, & felt very hopeless. After finding this site, I feel I have some hope again. I'm very thankfull. I'm new to all this, but if there is ever anything I can do, I'm more then willing. Right now the best I can do is pray. All for now, Love you all!!!