Moms--Is this Baby your Last?

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Registered: 05-11-2010
Moms--Is this Baby your Last?
23
Wed, 06-16-2010 - 5:33pm

So is your most recent WTT baby your last or are you once again WTT?

If you are planning another, when will you start TTCing again?

How long did it take you to TTC this baby?

If you are planning another, how long are you thinking it will take to TTC the next time?

If this baby is your last, how do you feel about that? Are you completely done or you just aren't sure? Do you and DH have different thoughts about an ideal family size?

Silly Expecting Siggy


pregnancy due date

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iVillage Member
Registered: 04-07-2003
Thu, 06-17-2010 - 4:47pm

Oh Mari! I really feel like I am the only one who has reactions like that! How awesome of your DH to not flip out on you - my DH gets so mad when I cry and of course that just stresses me out more. I have no outlet.


I really think that it's more along the line of I don't want more kids with DH. We aren't good together as parents. He doesn't support me emotionally and it's clearly something I need. I'm trying to do it all on my own and I've tried appeasing him by telling him that I've been looking up anger-management strategies to try and keep my meltdowns to a minimum. How sad is that?


Anna, yes, I have talked to him about it. I told him I need more emotional support and that I try my best and the emotions just come anyway sometimes. I said I need to express them, that I can't just try to bottle



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Registered: 05-11-2010
Thu, 06-17-2010 - 5:18pm

Aww Kelly I'm so sorry that you are unhappy.

Do you think DH would be interested in going to therapy with you? Maybe you could approach it like: "Look, I know you've mentioned that I get angry and I'm upset a lot, and it's something I want to deal with, but I really need you to be working with me too. Could we do therapy together? I think it would help me so much more if we were together on this." Sort of thing?

Honestly even if he doesn't want to do it with you, maybe you should just do it for yourself. It helped me SOOO much when I was depressed/feeling down, and maybe it would help you learn more strategies for getting DH to support you/communicate with you/whatever you need from him.

(((HUGS))) you are a great Mommy and even though I don't have a kid yet to talk about how I lost my patience with, I am CERTAIN it will happen before too long. My parents each, on separate occasions, broke down my door when they were angry with me and I locked it and they just HAD TO get at me and yell and rant right up in my face and not from the other side of my locked door. Then they proceeded to shake/yell at/probably even hit me a bit because I had pushed them to the edge of their sanity with my antics (this was all in my teen years). But they aren't horrible parents--I love them and feel like they did a great job raising me! But sometimes people lose their patience and do stupid things--and much more often, people lose their patience and FEEL stupid about it, when really the kid is completely unharmed by the whole situation (like Mari's story).

Anyway, I wish my parents had gotten therapy like, when I was two, so even though they got through it and we all sort of survived, I would highly recommend it!! :-)

(((HUGS))) We love you (and so does DH and Elena, I dare say)!!

Silly Expecting Siggy


pregnancy due date



Edited 6/17/2010 5:19 pm ET by cl-justadrienne

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iVillage Member
Registered: 07-15-2004
Thu, 06-17-2010 - 8:26pm

 Cassie 

     

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Registered: 11-01-2005
Thu, 06-17-2010 - 9:30pm

So is your most recent WTT baby your last or are you once again WTT?

WTT

If you are planning another, when will you start TTCing again?

Probably when Maxim is 3...so 2013ish

How long did it take you to TTC this baby?

One cycle

If you are planning another, how long are you thinking it will take to TTC the next time?

One to six? We take a very casual approach...NPP, not TTC....so whenever it happens

If this baby is your last, how do you feel about that? Are you completely done or you just aren't sure? Do you and DH have different thoughts about an ideal family size?

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iVillage Member
Registered: 09-12-2008
Thu, 06-17-2010 - 10:13pm

Interesting thread!


So is your most recent WTT baby your last or are you once again WTT? I am WTT again.


If you are planning another, when will you start TTCing again?

Avatar for berry81
iVillage Member
Registered: 02-27-2008
Thu, 06-17-2010 - 10:39pm

So is your most recent WTT baby your last or are you once again WTT?
>>>WTT again.

If you are planning another, when will you start TTCing again?
>>>We really don't know - not sure when we want to hop back on that crazy roller coaster - but probably around Eliza's 2nd birthday.

How long did it take you to TTC this baby?
>>>8 months overall before we got our sticky BFP - 3 m/c's along the way.

If you are planning another, how long are you thinking it will take to TTC the next time?
>>>I'm basically preparing myself for another tough road...so, a while. Though Grace's current sticky bean gives me a lot of hope!!

About # of kids... I honestly don't know! I guess we'll see how we feel after a second. Honestly, I am feeling a comfortable, wonderful sense of completeness with Eliza in our lives right now. But I definitely know I want to be PG again and I want Eliza to have a sibling, so yeah... I'm sure I'll start feeling the itch once Eliza gets a bit older. I think if it were up to DH, we'd have a litter, lol. He loves being a daddy and would love a big family :)




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March WTTG Siggy

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Registered: 12-04-2007
Thu, 06-17-2010 - 10:58pm

Ella- I was honestly really shocked to have this sticky bean so easily. I really hope the same happens for you and all the girls who had trouble with #1. It seems like a fairly common story that baby #1 "resets" everything and then baby #2 is much easier. I had my 12 weeks checkup today and honestly I was shocked that everything was just fine and the heart was beating away.

I guess this poll is mostly for mom's who aren't pg, but I'm going to do it anyway ;-)

So is your most recent WTT baby your last or are you once again WTT?
>>>I suppose technically we're WTT for #3, thought we haven't really decided for sure to have #3 or not. It's pretty hard to TTC while pg tho, so we're definitely WTT ;-)

If you are planning another, when will you start TTCing again?
>>>I really don't know. I don't think I'll go for so close of spacing again. It's a lot of work to be pregnant and have such a young toddler.

How long did it take you to TTC this baby?
>>>James it was a year, this baby it was our first month NPP.

If you are planning another, how long are you thinking it will take to TTC the next time?
>>>Who knows, this one was so easy, but I know we could have another experience like James where is takes a while, it's still a little unreal to me that this one was so easy...

About # of kids
>>> Most days I think I want 3 at least probably 4, during the first few weeks of morning sickness with this one I told my self no more. I guess we'll see how it is having two before we make any plans for having more, it's just so hard to know how things will be.

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Lilypie
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iVillage Member
Registered: 07-14-2008
Fri, 06-18-2010 - 1:44am
So is your most recent WTT baby your last or are you once again WTT?

At this point she's definitely our first and last.

Lilypie First Birthday tickers
iVillage Member
Registered: 12-23-2003
Fri, 06-18-2010 - 5:56am

Give yourself time Jen! I thought the first two weeks were really really awful. I was so depressed and miserable... and tired!
Around 6 weeks with the first smile things started to get better, but it really wasn't until 10 weeks that I felt like myself again and could really picture and enjoy how my life was going to be now that I was a mom.

Even though I am still tired life is so much more fun with baby once they really start interacting and showing their personality!!! Teddy is constantly smiling and "talking" now and it is hysterical.

Big hugs to you!

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Avatar for sandyc299
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Registered: 01-08-2008
Fri, 06-18-2010 - 6:27am

Ash- It looks like we are going to TTC around the same time (hopefully). I am looking around the same time frame although I may wait until David is a little closer to 2 but we'll see. I wonder with all the issues with sleep if dh will want another. Although I think once he's sleeping through the night he will change his mind and David gets older. When we got married we both said we wanted two kids. I think he'll change his mind eventually though. I know we're trying to pay some bills off and get finances in order so we can afford a 2nd in a few years. I know the other issue is our kids will be going to Catholic school and I think he's worried we won't be able to afford that or to send them to college.

I know my body needs a rest after having him. There is no way I could think about getting pregnant again anytime soon just because I can't think of going through that again without at least a rest of at least a 1 1/2 years.

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Thanks for the wonderful siggie Heather


David Nicholas 12/5/09
Expecting a GIRL 3/23/13