Potty training woes...

iVillage Member
Registered: 04-07-2003
Potty training woes...
8
Tue, 01-10-2012 - 2:10pm

Alright, I have some questions about the ever troublesome topic of potty training! We started trying to train Elena a couple of weeks ago, and she took to it really well - as long as she was naked. She went days with only minor accidents, and had a couple of days with no accidents at all! Of course, the minute we put underwear on her, she would have accidents left, right and centre. So I thought maybe we could just master the naked training first, and then progress to underwear. I naively thought this would all take no more than a week or two (the only other kids I'd had close contact with during potty training were my BFF's twins, who took over 2 years to train - but I just thought they were a big exception!)

Anyway, on Saturday she started having accidents. First one, then another, then another, then another. It's like all the progress she had made went right out the window - in fact she was doing worse than when she had first started! Hoping it was just a bad day, we continued keeping her bottomless on Sunday, and it was the same story. I had to work on Sunday evening and unfortunately DH told me that he got so frustrated he lost his cool with her and started harshly scolding her for having accidents (ugh!) Anyway, yesterday (Monday) was the same story - accident after accident, and if anything it almost seemed like she was doing it on purpose. I caught her looking down at herself a couple of times and then peeing. She'd always tell me, "Mommy I pee!" almost like she was proud of it. After 7 accidents in a 2.5 hour period, I'd finally had it and put her back in diapers.

I've had a couple of people tell me now that this is normal and that I should just stick it out. One of these people is a good friend who is an Occupational Therapist and works with small children, many of whom are having potty training difficulties, so I assume she knows what she's talking about. It's just that cleaning up accident after accident is getting to me - especially when I have another (younger) kid running around at the same time! Of course, this was the same reason my BFF above kept putting her twins back in diapers, and ended up stretching PT beyond 2 years!!!

Anyway, I guess I'm just looking for some reassurance that this is indeed normal, and I should just tough it out. I have her in diapers again today, I'm just at my wits end. The little girl I'm doing daycare for is here full-time this week, whereas normally I only have her 10-15 hours a week, so that's not helping. I just don't have enough hands to corall both of them while cleaning up messes (from a carpeted floor I might add) and trying to get Elena to the potty at the same time.

Should I wait until the weekend when things are clamer again, or will those few days in diapers be enough to just completely derail the progress she made in the first place (if it can even BE derailed further)???



Powered by CGISpy.com
iVillage Member
Registered: 10-15-2001
Tue, 01-10-2012 - 3:40pm
Kelly, I'm with you on hating the whole potty training thing. My first son (Fletcher) started using the potty sporadically when he was 18 months, but if we tried to make him go or put him in underwear, he screamed and cried. We decided to let him take the lead, and we didn't really get serious about potty training until he was over three years old. He was literally trained in about two days. Poop and pee. He had fewer than 10 accidents EVER, and he was fully night trained months before he was day trained.

Fast forward three years, and my second son (Jonah) is a totally different story. He turned three in July. He has gone in the potty from time to time since he was a little over a year old. He never acted frightened like Fletcher did, but he wasn't all that interested either. We probably could have really trained him sooner, but we were expecting a new baby and getting ready for a MAJOR move. I knew that he would be overwhelmed with changes, and I didn't want to add another big one. Charlotte was born on June 27, and we moved to Florida (from PA) on July 31. A few weeks later we started looking into preschools. We learned that the one we wanted required him to be potty trained (not surprised). With less than two weeks before the start of school, we put Jonah in underwear during the day and Pull-Ups at night. There were lots of accidents at home, but he has never had an accident at school or in public. The process has been rough. Lots of accidents. Lots of messes. Five months later, we are still dealing with accidents. Just last week, I was SO frustrated. Jonah had been doing so well until we returned from our visit to PA over Christmas. He was just pooping and peeing in his pants like he had never learned to use the potty at all. I was like WHAT?? I vented to a friend on Thursday night at my womens' group, and now Jonah is on day five without any accidents. Go figure. I don't know what goes through their little heads, but it seems like they just naturally go back and forth.

Jonah is not even close to night trained. I would love to know how you do that since I never had to night train Fletcher.

Good luck, Kelly. My vote is "yes, it's normal," and I keep thinking that potty training should be called "patience training" FOR PARENTS!!!
Photobucket
Avatar for sandyc299
iVillage Member
Registered: 01-08-2008
Tue, 01-10-2012 - 5:10pm

Kelly- I could have written this post myself. We are having the same issues with David. Before Christmas he started taking off his diaper wanting to go potty. So i thought maybe we would start. He started doing well (still in diapers) that we started. We had accidents after accident. So we went the naked route like you did. No accidents there. I was told not to stay naked too long so we went back to underwear. Same issue. Accidents. He will sometimes go if I remind him but otherwise he comes to me after he has an accident. Yesterday he finally told me he had to go during dinner---a first. So I am hoping it's a step in the right direction.

For the accidents we use underwear and put plastic pants over him so we don't have as much to clean up on the floor. Also not sure if they sell them in Canada, but they sell her training underwear which has the plastic pants built into the underwear.

David Nicholas 12/5/09
Expecting a GIRL 3/23/13

iVillage Member
Registered: 10-11-2005
Tue, 01-10-2012 - 5:40pm
We are having the same issues with Eloise. She is happy to go potty if she is naked most of the time, as soon as she has anything over her bottom she goes in it, undies or no. Except at preschool at preschool she stays dry the entire 4 hours there.

I've put her back in diapers, a few times when it got overwhelming, but generally now I just let her run around naked and figure it will click sooner or later.

Desmond wasn't interested at all until 3 3/4s after a quick flirt with it at 26 months, so having Eloise actually interested in it is different, but you know I sort of liked his done in 2 days thing once he was ready. I am still waiting for Eloise's 2 days. Eloise unlike Desmond will take off her diaper to pee and poop in the potty when she wants to go, which is why I am letting her go naked still, where she 90% of the time goes in the potty at least.



Thank you for the sig Mary

iVillage Member
Registered: 09-12-2008
Tue, 01-10-2012 - 9:44pm
Hugs Kelly!! We're just at the beginning stages of PT with Selin so not much advice to offer.

But, was just wondering if the other little girl being there FT is causing Elena to find ways to get your attention? Not that you're neglecting her in any way, just that she might be a little jealous of the other girl?

GL and KUP!

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-19-2007
Tue, 01-10-2012 - 10:55pm

I may be totally off on this - but 7 times in 2.5 hours seems like a lot - either Elena is peeing on purpose or she can't figure out how to get everything out on the potty.

Photobucket

iVillage Member
Registered: 08-24-2005
Wed, 01-11-2012 - 5:50am

Kelly, I'm sorry it's being so hard to potty train Elena... I'm having such a hard time with Fede that I've given up and decided to continue with diapers for a few more months.

Also, I agree with Christine, specially after reading that she peed 7 times in 2.5 hours... That totally sounds like she's calling your attention. And I'm sure having the other girl around is the reason. Not that you are doing anything wrong, it's just that kids are very sensitive with that kind of thing.

Photobucket

iVillage Member
Registered: 12-23-2003
Fri, 01-13-2012 - 4:25am
This thread makes me never want to potty train LOL. :) Kelly I think it is great if you decide to hang in there,but I also don't think taking a two week break will cause any real damage either:) Hugs!
Photobucket
iVillage Member
Registered: 04-07-2003
Sat, 01-14-2012 - 2:32pm
It's good to know that this does indeed seem to be normal, but doesn't make it less frustrating - lol!

Anyway, an update - we've been keeping her in diapers for the most part this past week, but now and then she would refuse to wear one, so we've taken the chance and just let her run around bottomless. She hasn't had a huge accident since Monday, so that's progress I guess! And this morning, DH got her out of bed and put a new diaper on her, and an hour and a hlaf later she said she had to go pee. So I took her, she peed on the potty, and lo and behold her diaper was actually dry! Definitely a good sign. :)


Powered by CGISpy.com