Question for moms of 2+

iVillage Member
Registered: 12-23-2003
Question for moms of 2+
23
Thu, 11-10-2011 - 11:39am

OK So I know this might sound silly but do you have favorites?

Right now it is very hard to imagine liking another child as much as we like our first.

I also am wondering how you deal with feelings of fairness, (for example the second child doesn't receive half as much individual attention as the first, and the first also gets much less time with mom and dad as they did for the first few years of life)?

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iVillage Member
Registered: 04-13-2008
Fri, 12-23-2011 - 6:46am
Chiming in again... I guess we were lucky as there was zero jealousy. Teddy did have an adjustment period, which lasted about 3 weeks. In which he started waking up at night again, and wanting more cuddles than before.
As to leaving them in a room together, I didn't to start with, but after a few weeks I did just because it was so impractical not to. We've had a few incidents - Teddy being a toddler and not knowing what can hurt a baby or upset it - but it was more stuff like he rolled him onto his tummy or patted his head too hard. Once I left them to go in the kitchen and heard this almighty scream. I ran back in and there was Teddy screaming, because Bo had grabbed a fistful of his hair and was pulling it ;)
They started playing with each other quite early on. Maybe because Teddy always had the desire to play with his brother and as soon as Bo was old enough to react, his patience was rewarded. Maybe it helps that they are both boys?
One more story. Last week, Bo was in hospital for bronchiolitis. It was a hard few days and Teddy was quite upset as obviously I stayed with Bo. When we got home, I expected Teddy would run straight to me to get a cuddle. As it happened, he ran towards me and gave Bo a hug! And then lots of kisses. Seriously they were just laughing and smiling at each other for a few minutes; and I hadn't even realised up to then how much they'd missed each other.
So even though I expect that "true" play and bonding will be a while yet, I'm amazed at how much they love each other already.

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Avatar for berry81
iVillage Member
Registered: 02-27-2008
Fri, 12-23-2011 - 7:55am
Aw Anna that is such a sweet story about Bo and Teddy missing each other. :)

iVillage Member
Registered: 09-08-2007
Fri, 12-23-2011 - 3:51pm

Mari, I know what you are saying.

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