Mamas due in July!
Thanks for starting the thread Adrienne.
How is everyone feeling these days?
Plans for 4th of July (or Canada Day or whatever summer holdiay in your neck of the woods)?
What's been the best thing so far about being PG?
What about the worst?
Thanks for starting a new thread, Adrienne!
Kate:How is everyone feeling these days?**I’m doing fairly well in general, though yesterday I had some pain in my sides (round ligament pain, I assume) and some foods still set me off.
Plans for 4th of July (or Canada Day or whatever summer holdiay in your neck of the woods)?**Canada Day was yesterday – we went and checked out a couple celebrations, but both were a bust (mostly everything around here is geared toward young kids…which will be wonderful for us in years to come, but boring right now). We did go see the local soccer team play, and that was fun.
What's been the best thing so far about being PG?**Just knowing there’s a little baby growing in there – and I get reminded of it more often now that I can feel them move around a lot.
What about the worst?**I think just my overall expectations – I really thought it was going to be this amazing experience, and I just haven’t enjoyed it like I thought I would. I guess I’m not one of those women who loves being pregnant.
Devin:Sorry that your 2nd pregnancy isn’t going as smoothly. I can’t imagine having to cook when you’re feeling ill, so kudos to you for hanging in there. I hope the whole insurance thing gets worked out soon, and yay for the upcoming u/s!
AFM: I’m kind of having a pity party right now. I talked to my mom on the phone and just feel like my parents aren’t super excited about the baby. Initially, we talked about her coming in mid-November and staying until the new year to help out. But, I talked to her today, and she asked how them coming on Dec. 24th and leaving on Jan. 1st would be --- and even asked if that would be too long :( I asked her if that meant she wasn’t coming earlier, and she said she could, but maybe only for a couple weeks, and we could talk about it later.
I don’t know…I guess I just feel so isolated and alone right now, and I’m really worried about feeling it even more when Baby G arrives. Both our parents are on the other side of the country. I thought my Mom was going to be here to help out for the first month or so, and now it sounds like she doesn’t even want to. To top it all off, we don’t really have any close friends here, and absolutely NO family, so I’m starting to freak out about having no support system here at all. I’m worried about getting PPD (I have had depression in the past), and not having anyone to help or turn to, you know?
Not sure if anyone has any advice, but I’m just feeling overwhelmed that we’re going to be doing this alone (you know….together). I mean, it’s wonderful to have DH around and I know he’ll be a great dad, but I feel like I need more a support system than that.
Blech – sorry for the pity party. It’s just been one of those days.
First off (((HUGS!!))....I know all too well how hard it is to not have family close by especially your own. I am lucky to have my in-laws but they arent the same...at least MIL's advice and thoughts arent the same as my own mom's, ya know? So I can relate...
It may not be a bad thing to have your mom come later after the baby arrives...at first I was a little upset that my parents werent here to hold my brand new baby like DH's family....but after they were here, I was glad for the wait. Maxim was a month old when they got here for their visit...and by then, we had a bit of a routine, BFing struggles were behind us (the first 2 weeks are super hard at least they were for me with the a**vice I got from the nurses), I was well healed and rested, my hormones back in line and ALL of the other family and friends had their turn and visits....so it was a really nice visit. You may also just be completely relieved when people arent visiting all the time or "helping." Sometimes people arent all that helpful and just want to hold the baby....the only help we got initially was a bag of groceries from my in-laws and a few meals from friends...SUPER helpful dont get me wrong, but not this huge influx of help either. It was good for us to do things alone...and you'll be amazed at how self-sufficient you and DH will be with your new baby too.
The other thing that we now have is webcams....so at least once a week, we get on with my parents and the baby and we chat...and Maxim really responds when he hears my parents voice...and he really does turn to the screen to check things out! Its so cool....its not the same but it helps for sure. Think about it for you and Kyle to stay connected with both of your families.
Maybe just ask your mom about her excitement level...it may seem to you that she isnt excited but its perhaps because they are so far away that she feels a bit disconnected...I felt this way at the start of my PG too and it was really the distance, not the lack of excitement.
As for PPD, all you can do at this point is be aware of it, make Kyle aware of the signs and aware of your own personal risk factors so you can prepare ahead of time, just in case. Does your city have an Early Years Centre? We have one here and I havent been there yet but intend to go soon hopefully...they have mommy and me groups, breast feeding support and a host of resources...at least have the phone numbers available ahead of time :)
Sorry this was such a novel....hope this helps :)
Alyssa - I feel your pain. We don't have any family nearby either and it's a little hard to know that except for a couple of weeks with parents visiting, we'll be on our own. Don't be afraid to tell your mom what you want and need though--she may just be afraid of overstepping and doesn't want to push an extended stay on you. I've got a bit of the opposite problem--I know my retired in-laws would move in if they could so I feel like I'm kind of limiting my mom's first visit so that they know they're not welcome to just camp out for weeks on end. (More on this down below...) I'm also concerned about PPD as I have a history of depression too, so don't be afraid to check in with me (and everyone here!) if things get rocky. I know I won't hesitate to get on some meds if it starts to get bad. Not much help, but I do sympathize.
AFM - I went home for my shower last weekend and it was super fun. Got a lot of good stuff and I think we'll be pretty well set once I go through all of it. I don't think we'll ever run out of blankets. :)
I am a little frustrated with my ILs though. They do all of this "Tell us what you guys want us to do when the baby comes" but then when I do tell them what DH and I decided, I get the impression that they're disappointed--I think with the time limit we set for them being here. And to top it off, DH told me a few weeks ago that his SIL wanted to come out for a week in October. Come to find out, she wants to/has to come out in SEPTEMBER b/c of her job. She and DH are NOT close and I absolutely do not want to be stuck in the house with her for a week, especially since DH will be back to work. I get so stressed just thinking about it. I just don't know how she could possibly think it's a good idea to a) invite herself that soon and b) stay for so long! (Of course, she did think it would be a good idea to move into our basement--DH told her absolutely not--so she's got a couple of screws loose.) And my MIL, who I expected to "get it," was like "Oh, she'll be a great help" when DH brought it up. I mean, what, is she going to help me breastfeed??? She's certainly not the type to help out with cooking or cleaning. I just don't think she realizes what life is going to be like with a newborn and how I'm not just going to leave and have her babysit, for crying out loud. See? I get so worked up about it. I just have to have DH put his foot down and limit her visit or I'll have to do it myself. Wow, sorry for the extended rant. :)
Devin--I'm so glad that you've gotten the insurance thing figured out. Yay for having an appointment scheduled soon! And I totally feel you on the m/s. Mine is finally starting to get better. It's been a long road. Oh...I LOVE your new siggy!
Alyssa--I don't have any advice for you, just (((((Hugs))))). Even if your mom doesn't make it out when Baby G is born, I'm sure you and DH will be able to handle it all just fine.
Erin--Youch on the SIL situation!! That sounds absolutely crazy. While it's probably better for DH to handle it, I encourage you to put your foot down soon. If they get upset, blame it on the hormones.
AFM--I had my 28w appointment today, and met one of the other doctors in the practice. She was ok, but I definitely didn't feel as good about her as I do about my doctor.
Of course, the whole visit started off a little shaky. I got there and the nurse asked why I hadn't done my glucose test yet. Umm...I did it two weeks ago. Then she couldn't find it in the computer. It eventually turned up, and I passed. They want a number <135, and mine was 102. My iron was barely acceptable, but at least I don't need any supplements. And I've gained 5 pounds, so I'm now officially up 6 total.
Other than that, we've just been trying to finish up some house projects so I can start on the nursery. DH put all the cloth diapers I've bought so far in our closet, and I organized them last night. Totally didn't realize I already had 18 one-size, and then some small AIOs and prefolds. I've cut myself off until Dot gets here. Well, after I spend the $100 gift certificate MIL sent me!
And Kate's questions:How is everyone feeling these days? I'm definitely feeling better. I'm just throwing up about once a week now. But I have learned that chicken noodle soup gives me heartburn. Go figure.
Plans for 4th of July (or Canada Day or whatever summer holdiay in your neck of the woods)? We're not doing anything. After traveling the last two weekends, we both need a break. I might see if I can convince DH that we need to create our own (indoor) fireworks, but I'm guessing he'll be too tired.
What's been the best thing so far about being PG? I really love feeling the kicks and pokes (as long as they aren't in my hip bone). And I love all the ice cream I've been eating.
What about the worst? The m/s was pretty bad. Yeah...I would say that's been the worst.
Devin ~ Glad you got the insurance business straightened out. T he IRS had my b-day wrong for the longest time, that was such a pain to fix. Sorry this PG is being so hard on you. I couldn't imagine being PG with a little one... kudos to you.
Alyssa ~ Alyssa sorry things with your mom are so tough right now. Personally I am dreading telling my mom about this baby, she gets so nervous when I am PG and has been telling DH and I this for months now. I hope everything works out for you.
Erin ~ Erin, I agree w/ Liz, but your foot down and blame the hormones.
Liz ~ Sorry about your last appointment. I hate when they start on the wrong foot like that. What are your plans for the nursery?
AFM ~ It turns out that I don't have MS, thankfully. I was having an adverse reaction to my prenatal. My Dr's office gave me samples of 5 different types to try.
How is everyone feeling these days? Msuch better (see above)... so much better DH might actually get lucky this weekend.
Plans for 4th of July (or Canada Day or whatever summer holdiay in your neck of the woods)? It's my Grandma's 75th b-day so we're having a surprise party/bbq for her. Right now DS is running a fever and vomited all over DH's truck so I am hoping he's better by then.
What's been the best thing so far about being PG? Watching DH, he's been adorable.
What about the worst? The 2 weeks I thought I was having MS.
I hope DS feels better soon! It's no fun to be sick in the summer.
For the nursery, I'm painting the walls pale green, and will probably use brown sheets and such in the crib. It's a forest theme, so we have some stuffed animals to display, and I'm going to get my brother to draw our artwork. I'm also considering getting our young cousins to draw pictures and framing those for the walls.
Thanks for the support, ladies.
Ruby – That’s a good point about getting settled in before someone comes for an extended stay. I guess I’ve just had this idealized situation in my mind where my mom would be here to help out, you know? So it’s disappointing that it won’t be as I imagined. But, you might be right in that it might be better this way! I will talk to her about it, and their excitement level – it could just be the distance thing. I also know my parents sometimes get so caught up in “trying not to pry” that it comes off as being disinterested. I’ll have to see if there’s an Early Years Centre or something similar here – something to ask my midwife about for sure.
Erin – yes, I could see my parents doing that: not wanting to step on my toes, even though we’ve talked about it already. I will talk with her again about it next time we chat. I’m also worried about the balance between the time my parents spend here and the IL’s – I don’t want my IL’s to think they can come here for 1 month if my parents do.
Sorry about your whole situation with your SIL – that sounds super frustrating. Definitely DH needs to get in there and put his foot down.
Liz – Thanks for your hugs and thoughts. I have confidence that DH and I can handle Baby G ourselves, but it would be nice to have a support system in place, you know?
Sorry your appointment was kind of strange. At least you know you passed the glucose test and won’t have to worry about that.
Kate – why is your mom so nervous for you being PG? So glad you figured out that it was the prenatal vitamins that were making you sick – are you feeling much better now? Poor DS :( Hopefully he feels better soon.
AFM – our u/s is today!! I’m excited to see Baby G, but am totally trying to prepare myself for the tech not telling us the gender. I think I’ll still be disappointed if they don’t though. I will post an update once I know anything (or if we get a picture of the area).