QOTW: How Often do you and DH/SO DTD?

iVillage Member
Registered: 09-08-2007
QOTW: How Often do you and DH/SO DTD?
30
Wed, 08-17-2011 - 4:12pm

Inspired by another thread, haha . . .obviously only answer questions that you are comfortable sharing about, and skip the rest!

How often do you and DH do the deed?

If it were solely up to DH, how often would you?

If it were solely up to you, how often would you?

Has this changed since you first got together?

Has it been different at different times in your relationship?

Do you usually/always/never have the big O from DTD?

Any tips for the difficult Oers out there?

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iVillage Member
Registered: 10-14-2007
Thu, 08-18-2011 - 6:41pm
How often do you and DH do the deed? Not often enough! It has really varied during the pregnancy - while away on vacation we DTD 4x, but we have only done it 1x in the past month. Fatigue has returned for me and DH has been working a lot (and went to Vegas for several days with the boys), so it has been hard to have the energy and time to really spend with each other.

If it were solely up to DH, how often would you? At least a few times a week

If it were solely up to you, how often would you? As often as I feel like it (probably at least 1x a week).

Has this changed since you first got together? Absolutely. We DTD ALL the time when we first started dating. But as the years went on, we did it less and less. Part of the decline was when I was on the pill and it totally killed my libido. I stopped taking them after awhile because of that and weight gain.

Has it been different at different times in your relationship? Yes

Do you usually/always/never have the big O from DTD? Not always, but fairly often

Any tips for the difficult Oers out there? Keep trying new things!
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iVillage Member
Registered: 09-12-2008
Fri, 08-19-2011 - 1:20am

Very interesting topic! Learning a lot of good tips and tricks, lol! ;-)

How often do you and DH do the deed? Not nearly as often as I would like. Lately it's been about once every 3 weeks or so.

If it were solely up to DH, how often would you? Once a month (feel like I'm in the minority here.)

If it were solely up to you, how often would you? As often as I feel like it (probably at least 1x a week).

Has this changed since you first got together? Absolutely. I was a virgin when we met and he was trying to get in my pants from our first few dates, lol, but I was able to hold him off for a few months. Like someone else said, whenever we had 10 min. alone, we would fool around (I was still living at home and he was living with his siblings so neither place had complete privacy). Things definitely changed after I got PG. DH was so afraid to DTD until I was like 4-5 months along. He surprised me by DTD on my due date, which may or may not have caused me to go into labor the next morning! Now we are so tired all of the time and stressed with work and school so it takes a real effort to get in the mood. Usually I have to convince him. Also now that I'm no longer on the pill, we have to stop in the middle of fooling around so I can go and put my spermicide in. Kind of kills the mood. :-/

Has it been different at different times in your relationship? Yes, see above.

Do you usually/always/never have the big O from DTD? Sad to say,

iVillage Member
Registered: 10-15-2001
Fri, 08-19-2011 - 12:04pm

Okay.

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iVillage Member
Registered: 04-22-2006
Fri, 08-19-2011 - 1:17pm
I'm not comfortable in answering the questions specifically, but I wanted to chime in anyway :)

When we first started dating, DH and I couldn't keep our hands off each other. About six months into our relationship, his grandmother died, and we didn't DTD for a couple months. That pretty much sums up how things are with us: we go through periods of DTD a lot, and then long periods of it being a rare occurrence. Since I got PG, it's been pretty difficult to get things going on a regular basis (I was really sick for the first 15 weeks, then dealing with the abscess on my butt certainly didn't help things, then Evan came, then PP, etc..).

I find that when we DTD, I really enjoy it and feel connected to him, but I find it really difficult to rev myself up for it. Honestly, it's barely on my radar. We are both low libido people, so it's fine for both of us, though I know he would like it more.

As for the big O, I have it 95% of the time, either during the actual DTD or manually before and/or after. I claim success in that area by knowing my body very well on my own!




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iVillage Member
Registered: 08-24-2005
Fri, 08-19-2011 - 3:01pm

It's interesting to see how it works differently for each couple. I think that as long as the marriage is happy and feels connected, there are no "right numbers".

You know, what sometimes I'd like, is to have the kind of sex that people say make you feel "connected". It may sound weird, but we usually connect in other ways, mostly talking or doing something meaningful for eachother. But the corny, romantic, VANILLA sex, kind of eludes us!!!! It's usually something more physical for us, we do have a lot of humor involved (like we really can crack eachother up right in the middle of it). But I think I can count wit my fingers the number of times we've had the kind of sex where you look at eachother eyes and feel in the middle of a romantic novel.

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iVillage Member
Registered: 09-15-2007
Fri, 08-19-2011 - 4:07pm

How often do you and DH do the deed? usually around three nights a week, sometimes four.

If it were solely up to DH, how often would you? 6-7 times a week.

If it were solely up to you, how often would you? 5 times a week.

<*KATJA*> My Ovulation Chart
iVillage Member
Registered: 09-01-2004
Fri, 08-19-2011 - 4:14pm

How often do you and DH do the deed?

Usually twice a week as long as everybody goes to bed on time. LOL


If it were solely up to DH, how often would you?

Maybe 3 times a week???

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iVillage Member
Registered: 09-01-2004
Fri, 08-19-2011 - 4:17pm
We have something similar that attaches to him. It is called Diablo! I love Diablo! (No I didn't name it that. That was the name of the product in the catalog. LOL)
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iVillage Member
Registered: 08-24-2005
Fri, 08-19-2011 - 4:22pm

24 times in 3 days???

That´s amazing!

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iVillage Member
Registered: 08-24-2005
Fri, 08-19-2011 - 4:26pm

Christine- My DH is like that about toys... To him they are "competition". So you are not alone there. He is ok with costumes, lingerie, oils/lubricants... but definitely nothing with batteries!

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