WWYD/ positive thoughts, please

iVillage Member
Registered: 04-17-2002
WWYD/ positive thoughts, please
Tue, 07-24-2012 - 9:55pm

Background: we moved in March about 3 hours away from the area I had lived my whole life to be closer to my stepdaughter. I have been having a difficult time being away from "home" and further from my mom. I started a job at a clinic in May, and so far I have really been liking it, except the fact that I'm making $1.50 less an hour as an LPN than I was as a CNA.

The past couple of weeks I've been browsing LPN jobs in our previous area. I applied for 3 total. Well, the HR department called me yesterday and I have an interview on Friday. I am having mixed feelings about it.

The pros of possible new job: better pay, located closer to friends and my family, it's in the area where I would like to buy a house (we plan to buy a house later this fall/winter), I would back in a hospital instead of a clinic, would be much easier to go back to school, would likely be able to start classes this fall, and this in turn would likely push TTC forward.

The cons of possible new job: probably more stress (job is on mental health unit), I would be back on 2nd shift (which would be better school-wise, but worse family wise), we'd have to move (again!) within like a month, we'd be 3ish hours away from my stepdaughter again.

What would you do? I am trying to see the best of both sides so I won't be disappointed one way or the other. I'm trying to be at peace, so I can just go with the flow and trust in the universe that if it's meant to happen, it will. So, if you don't have any advice, just some peaceful thoughts would be much appreciated!

iVillage Member
Registered: 08-04-2003
Re: WWYD/ positive thoughts, please
Wed, 07-25-2012 - 8:27am
I agree w/ E; but I've seen the added stress it can add having to drive long distances to see kids, etc. That adds a whole new layer of stress. How about looking for something in the middle?
iVillage Member
Registered: 02-16-2008
Wed, 07-25-2012 - 10:06am
Why does DF think you haven't given the new area a fair shot? It's really a decision you have to come to together.

As well, think about the stress of hauling two kids to pick up Hailey on your weekends. That can add in extra issues.

Regardless, lots of peaceful thoughts coming your way!
by sara photo sigbysara.jpg
iVillage Member
Registered: 09-08-2007
Wed, 07-25-2012 - 8:44pm

Sighhhhhh I wrote a whole response and it somehow got lost.

That is a tough decision but here are my 2 thoughts in terms of helping to decide (more abridged than when I first wrote them, LOL) 

1)  It takes a while to settle into a new place.  Have you been going to library, playgrounds, playgroups, work events, etc to try to make new friends for you and Max?  That can make such a big difference with how comfortable you are in a new place.  You are missing the support of home but it's possible to build new support where you are and it might make you feel a lot better about it.

2)  Do NOT underestimate the difficulty of working with mental health patients.  It is emotionally/psychologically trying, tiring, taxing--honestly I don't think it is worth the raise myself UNLESS you are really attracted/interested in that area of nursing.  Also keep in mind that the more naturally empathetic and caring you are (which a lot of nurses are), the more it will "get in your head" to work with people with mental health issues.  With this said, I don't think the job ultimately should be the deciding factor.  If you think hard about what (where) is best for your family, you can make that area your ultimate goal and then take the time to find a job that works for you.

I think a lot of people already had good advice, too!  It is a hard decision, but I think either way you'll be able to find a way to be happy and take care of your family.   (((HUGS))), KUP Mama.

iVillage Member
Registered: 10-15-2001
Wed, 07-25-2012 - 11:23pm
Wow, Morgan. That is a complicated one. I would lean toward being closer to Halley because I would think it would put less stress on your family overall and make it easier for Halley and Max to build a relationship, but the pros that you listed in favor of the new job sound great. Especially being near family.

I think I would just wait (hard, I know!) and evaluate the whole situation when all the info is in. In the mean time, I hope you can find some peace with the situation. (((Cyber hugs coming your way!)))
iVillage Member
Registered: 09-12-2008
Sun, 07-29-2012 - 11:42pm

How did your interview go on Friday, Morgan? Keeping you in my thoughts that everything works out for the best!!