Wind Knocked Out of My Sails...

iVillage Member
Registered: 07-18-2012
Wind Knocked Out of My Sails...
3
Wed, 03-20-2013 - 5:35pm

I work in childcare, and I love it. The kids are great, and for the most part so are their parents. It's especially convenient because when I announced my own pregnancy, my boss warmly welcomed the idea of having my DD attend our facility. I only need childcare two days a week because DH and I only have two coinciding work days, so he will be home with DD when I am not.

Throughout the pregnancy, I have re-confirmed with my boss that we would have space for DH for those two days. Over and over again, I have heard "No problem!" Perfect. No stress associated with having strangers take care of her. No worry about whether she'd have quality childcare. I could be right here to watch her in her daycare setting. And even though there have been a lot of times during my employment at this company where I have been the go-to, the slack-catcher, and others have been favored over me, knowing that I'd be right there with DD made it all okay.

When I was 32 weeks along, my boss approached me. Nothing personal, purely business, but we aren't going to have the space for DD to attend afterall. She's a part-time client, and we can't afford to fill a spot that a full-timer could take with someone who will only be here two days a week. Oh, and the full-timer that will be taking that spot is another teacher, one who doesn't work as hard, who never comes in early or stays late or catches the slack, but she's due to have her baby in August so she takes precedence.

I. Am. Livid. Does anyone think I'm overreacting by looking for another job? I just think that it is unrealistic for me to continue working for a thankless company when they've pulled the rug out from under me in such a drastic way. And I know that I will be VERY stressed out returning to work with DD elsewhere - which will serve as a constant reminder and keep me seething over the injustice indefinitely. I have given this company my best, my all, and they seat me with their table scraps. And not only have they crossed me now, but they've crossed my child, which is one step WAY over the line. What would you do?

Community Leader
Registered: 07-26-1999
Thu, 03-21-2013 - 11:19am

If you can afford to look and find another place to work that will have an opening for your baby, I would by all means do that.  As a daycare provider, your boss should have known the importance of your ability to have your child with you when you returned to work, but also having plenty of advanced notice.  I don't know about your area, but in ours, daycares can easily have a waiting list for an infant spot of 6 months!  I do understand the business end of it and having a full time paying kid is more valuable than a part timer, but as an employee, that is usually a perk you enjoy.  I would definitely be upset.

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iVillage Member
Registered: 07-18-2012
Sat, 03-23-2013 - 4:31pm

To add insult to injury, the boss approached me yesterday asking for a $5 donation so that we could buy the other girl a baby present. First, we have a LOT going on financially, especially with the baby due in 5 weeks. Second, I doubt very much if it's any secret that I do not get along with the other girl - in fact, she goes out of her way to avoid speaking to me, even on work-related matters that NEED to be communicated. And third (not that I really care about this one, but it shows the favoritism in the workplace a little more prominently), the company didn't pool resources to buy a baby present for our family when I announced my pregnancy. Mind you, my baby has what she needs and I don't want to sound like a wounded four year-old with the classic "That's not faaaair!" but what's good for the goose should be good for the gander, if a company is not going to do things equally for their employees then they should not do anything at all.

I am actively searching for another job. I won't drop this one until I am sure I have something else lined up (we definitely couldn't afford it) but I just know I'm going to be desperately unhappy if I stay. A good friend of mine has offered to provide childcare; she's a bit out of my way but I am going to look for work closer to her so that it won't be as bad. Her rates are more reasonable and my daughter will probably receive better, more one-to-one care with her anyhow. The great thing is the friend has children of her own, one of which will only be a few months old by the time my daughter arrives, so the social aspect of a daycare will still be present. I can only hope that my work situation pans out the way I need it to - and maybe I can even find something with a better pay bracket. I'm trying to look at this as a good thing. I haven't been happy in my current situation for awhile now, and this way I can find work that makes me happy as well as a higher income to help my family, and I'll be able to better build on the friendship with the woman who'll be taking care of DD!

iVillage Member
Registered: 09-12-2003
Thu, 03-28-2013 - 7:15am

We do pools at work and I don't give for everyone. We have one guy that NEVER gives, claims religous reasons. OK fine but when his wife had a baby I didn't feel guilty saying no. So let me get this straight its against his religion to participate in giving gifts but ok to accept?!?!? NO

They do try to do for everyone but really it depends on the supervisor. My son is having surgery next week. Its not major but its not minor either. Its not elective he HAS to have to it. This is surgery number 5 and I have worked at same place each time. Now don't get me wrong I don't expect anything but when I hear someone had elective plastic surgery and you take a collection and my kid had medically necessary surgery 2 weeks before and you did nothing, not even a card... Now that said I did get shower for each kid and I felt bad second one but as it worked out there was another girl due 4 weeks after me so they combined it and I let her get most of attention eventhough in reality between kid 1 and kid 2 only 3 people were there for both and its 5 years apart so not like it was like we JUST had one for her. But we had a director who had 4 kids in 6 years and finally it was like really we have to give AGAIN.

I do get the business part of giving full time priority but if you asked first and its not a matter of starting same time. I mean how much further are you then her, won't babies be moving up?

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