I am new to this message board but desperately need advice. My 17 yr old daughter just told me she and her boyfriend of 3 months had sex and she wants to go on birth control.
I am sure some of you will think it is wonderful that at least she told me.. and I recognize it is. We have always had such a close relationship, I have been a single parent almost all of their lives ( I have an almost 16 yr old daughter as well)
We have always had a very open and honest and very trusting relationship.. but I have to tell you I am just devastated over this news.
My oldest daughter is the type of kid any parent would be thrilled to have. She is polite, respectful, a straight A student, very responsible. Her teachers constantly tell me how lucky they are to have her in their classrooms. She is involved in school, has aspirations to be a doctor..I could always trust her 110%, if she said she was going to do something I knew she would do it.
So when she came to me this afternoon and told me I felt like my world had just collapsed. Not only do I worry about her lost innocence, I wonder if I can trust her?
To the best of my knowledge she has never lied to me before... and here now is one of the biggest lies of all. Her boyfriend is not allowed in the house when I am not home, but she let him in and they had sex in her bedroom one afternoon. She says it has not happened since, although she thinks they might again (hence the request for birth control) and she absolutely insists he did not pressure her at all.
I can't help but feel like I have failed as a parent somehow, that our lives have changed completely in a blink of an eye. I feel like I have lost my little girl.
Any advice would be appreciated, am I over reacting? I know I can't forbid her from seeing him but right now I can't even bear the thought of him being in our home.