well after spending the weekend playing happy families where the H actually came home i finally got a hold of his phone despite his efforts to keep me from it. He had been texting the OW even though he told me that he ended it. He texted her he misses her and loves her... i don't know what to do. he has spent the weekend with me telling me he loves me.. we had a fun weekend and while i knew our issues weren't gone i thought maybe there is hope.

but now with his first IC just hrs away I'm left trying to hold myself together. haven't said anything to him yet - I'm so afraid that this is the end but then who am i kidding. he hasn't done anything to try and save our marriage he's just made it worse with the continued A and lies.

I'm falling apart and have no one to catch and put the pieces back together. i don't know how I'm going to tell the kids that their parents aren't going to be together any more - they are going to be so confused especially after this weekend but i just can't see any other ending if he's not willing to end the A and concentrate on us.

Falling apart - praying for a Miracle