I received an invitation for a bridal shower for my cousin and the girl he's engaged to. I've never met her, and didn't even know he had been dating someone until I was informed he had picked a date for the wedding. The shower (and wedding) is taking place out of town - at least 7 hours away by car. I was told before that the 'out-of-town' relatives and friends weren't going to be receiving invitations for either the 'engagement party' (What is that? It was never even acknowledged when I got engaged) or the 'bridal shower.' Money is EXTREMELY tight (I'm lucky if I have $50 to my name) for me, and I can't afford to travel and buy a gift for both the shower (which takes place in May) and the wedding (which is in July). So would it be 'selfish' (I can't think of a better word to describe it) of me to just 'lie' and say I never received the shower invitation? God only knows plenty of mail gets lost all the time. Also, my aunt (the groom's mother) is a lawyer, and my uncle is a doctor - so they have all of my (huge) family and their 'have-lots-of-money' friends to buy them gifts. Also, I forgot to mention that they're registered at 3 pretty expensive places - all way beyond what I would be able to spend - and all their registry wish lists are at least 5 pages long each. So what difference would my not attending or sending a gift make? I'd love to hear opinions on this. Thanks!