I had a revelation the other night that I thought I would share with all of you. Being a veteran singleton myself, I know how hard things can be. Eight months ago, my circumstances changed and I crossed over to the "other side," but I still have not forgotten the life I had prior to being in a relationship. I had been a "singleton" on and off (mostly on) for about six years and during that period I spent a lot time just growing up. I really took some time to get to know myself and establish goals for my life. I am not saying that I was in a constant state of euphoria and that every day brought a new epiphany, but I did learn quite a bit. There were plenty of days where I felt hopeless about ever meeting someone who understood me, or really wanted to take the time to get to know who I am. However, despite all of my hardships, something kept pushing me forward.
One important thing I learned to do is to "let go." For someone with a stereotypical Type A personality, this was not (and still isn't) an easy feat. However, I noticed, on days where I was just living in the moment, that things seemed a little bit more pleasant and life handed me the things I was so desperately wishing for...namely to find a mate.
This is all leading up to my main point. When I come back and lurk here for a while, I notice regular patterns. A lot of singletons post confused messages about "Why hasn't he called," or "Why do men do this?" You get the picture. Questions that try to extract bits of human nature and dissect them to make sense of what seems like chaos. However, I am here to tell you, as living proof, that when you meet the right one, a good one, none of these questions will make any difference. You won't need the answers because it will be so easy just to "be" with the person you have found. I am not saying that you won't have questions at all; my boyfriend baffles me daily, but the need to find the answers won't be as pressing. You can just relax and know that you have plenty of time to figure it all out. So, hang in there and just relax. If you find yourself asking such ominous questions about someone you have just met...or even someone you have been dating for a while, maybe it is a sign to reevaluate what you are doing there.
Keep your chin up and relax, he or she is waiting out there for you.
With lots of hugs,