Hey all. I am new here but have been lurking for a few days. Today was a bit of a rough day for me but I'll get to that...

First, I am 40 with two kids, ages 12 and almost 8. My DH is 38, no kids. We thought about ttc before we were married but thought it was too much to add to our plate at the time. We've been married for 14 months now and have been ttc since that day. I've never been a regular period kind of girl, but since I have 2 kids already and didn't really "try" for them (didn't NOT try either) I expected an easier path. I went to my OB/GYN for my yearly exam and she suggested we try Clomid since it's been over a year with no result. She told me to call on CD1 and we'd start Clomid on CD3-7. CD1 took several months to arrive (again... not a regular girl.)

FINALLY CD1 came and I started 50mg on CD 3. No major side effects except I was a bit of a nasty meany at times. Have been doing the OPK but nothing going on. I went to have a follicular scan on Tuesday which was CD14. It showed one follicle measuring 10mm. Doc says this was not what she hoped for but come back in 2 days to see if there was growth.

So, I went in today for scan #2. Doc was out delivering babies but I could tell it was not good news from the sonographer. She said she didn't see any mature follicles and that the doc would call me later. She also asked if I had trouble getting pg with the other two because of my polycystic ovaries. WHAT?!?!?! I didn't know I had PCOS. Again, I didn't have "trouble" per se, because we weren't "trying." I just went to the parking lot and called my DH and tried not to cry. I did after we hung up.

I was running around all day and wasn't home when the doc called. DH spoke to her and she told him she wasn't hopeful (this month? at all? not sure). No growth on the 10mm follicle. She wants to try again on the next CD1 with 100mg. I guess he asked if it was safe and about the side effects because she asked if we wanted to proceed to the next step. He has been through the IVF process in his previous marriage and he's adamant he doesn't want to go that route again.

I'm just feeling a bit sorry for myself. I had every expectation that I was just going to ovulate late, since I don't have a regular cycle and that 10mm was perfectly normal for me at CD14.

Trying to stay positive and hoping for the best.