i'm having flashbacks and nightmares but not of the sexual abuse, but the physical and mental abuse and others that my rapist did to me. I have always thought that dealing with the rape and my other sexual trauma would put it all to rest and I'm finding that isn't the case.
Today I took DD out to eat and while there someone I knew(not well) grabbed me from behind(like my abuser would do before throwing me against something) and I screamed and almost hit him. I was a mess and everyone was looking at me. I then got really claustropobic and couldn't breath.
I see my therapist on Tuesday and think I am going to have to start working in this and hope it doesn't trigger a bipolar episode.