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Home > About to get married to a cop

[1]
TallJ [1]
iVillage Member
Registered: 04-28-2012
About to get married to a cop
1
Sat, 04-28-2012 - 7:50pm

Hey ya'll,

I am getting married in 2 weeks to a police officer who lives in a different town than I am currently living in. We have known each other over 3 years and he has been a police officer for almost 5. Just as his girlfriend, and fiance', I have already experienced struggles with the lifestyle that is his career. It seems at times that he has to live this entirely 2nd seperate life that I know nothing about, and for the most part, really Can't know anything about for the specific issues he deals with on a daily basis.  I feel like I am understanding of those necessities, but I find it hard to know how to be supportive or understanding when I don't have a clue what is going on/what he's had to deal with that day.  I feel like being a police officer is so far from any other job someone may have, where they can freely come home and discuss their day at "the office" and I could somewhat relate to his day-to-day things .... I just have difficulty relating i guess. It's scary because his job is such a huge part of his life and that is therefore a huge part of "our" life that I am essentially not a part of. That's difficult ... as I think he knows all about my life, and it feels unequal. 

So I am moving to a new town, because he's pretty rooted there and I don't mind, since I lost my job anyway [the company closed] and I won't have any family still in this town I am currently in by the time I move anyway. But with myself looking for/starting new work, moving to a new place, where I have yet to make friends or find a church to get rooted in ... being a cop wife on top of it, where several nights a week I know I will be alone most of the night ... it's hard already. I don't know how I'm going to handle adjusting to it all. I've had a difficult year. Can anybody offer me some encouraging tips? Support? This site seems helpful but I have read so far a lot of sad situations that are discouraging me. Not to mention I personally have a few friends who were married to a cop and it didn't work out for sad reasons.  Thanks everybody for your time <3 

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