My husbands sister just died of a heart attack and they are in the mist of making the arrangements. His sister had been homeless and had been living in shelters and most recently she was taking care of this sick elderly woman in the womans home in order to have a place to live and she hated it.
Non of her siblings including my husband would allow her to live with them, even her own son who had a three bedroom house with three levels would not only not let her live with him but would not even allow her to visit or know where he lived. Admittedly she had emotional issues that made it had to deal with her, but no one even tried to get her mental help, they simply avoided her and said she was crazy.
Now his family is trying to have this expensive funeral, her son only has $4000 and the funeral they want to have cost almost $8000 and they are asking everyone to chip in. The problem is my husband is self employed and his business has been very slow and I am disabled and on disability and have been paying almost all the bills because my husband has not been working.
My husband has no money to contribute and wants me to take $800 out of my money to give to his family because he does not want to tell his family he does not have the money and we can't afford it. My position is...they did not care enough about her to give her a place to live or try to get her mental help while she was alive and now they want to give her this expensive funeral to put on a show for the public eye.
I know they can have her cremated for less than $4000 and have a nice memoral service for far less than $8000 and I can't see giving $800 of my money that I need for my bills because my inlaws want to give my sister inlaw this expensive funeral because they feel guilty about how they treated her in life. Am I wrong for feeling like this or should I bite the bullet and give up the money even though we can't afford it?