After a comment I made to H yesterday we didnt speak most of the day. He said to me last night " I will never do it again...what is your biggest fear"? To wich I replied
" I do not have any FEAR. I have lived thru THREE affairs...I can and will live thru another if it happens again..but I wont be living thru it with you. It is not so much fear as it is anxiety. Because if you do it again my whole life and our childrens lifes change. There will be no contact with you outside of a court room. This means that at my age, I will have to start all over again. New home, back to my old town...everything different. At my age starting all over again is not something I look forward to..but will do in a heartbeat before I will EVER put up with your stuff again. NO woman should go thru what I have been thru and THIS woman will never be there again. I have some money socked away. I have a place I can go. I will give 100% to this marriage now..but screw me over again and it is over"
He got quiet. Changed the subject and has been very sweet.