Not exactly how I wanted to spice up the board, but we had a rough evening.
Too shorten the story, DD12 blurted out at the dinner table to SO that she wished he didn't live here. They have been getting along really well the last several months and even right up until dinner everything was fine. It started with conversation about wearing makeup to school and it just kind of morphed into her crying, saying "I don't have a choice" regarding SO, or her step-mom, for that matter, and said "I am happier at my dads, even though they fight all of the time, I still like it better there."
She does, every so often, tell me she wishes SO didn't live there. But she is 12.
SO was supposed to be somewhere, and she kind of hit a wall and didn't want to talk, so I said we needed a break and could pick things back up.
The thing with her is, she has these "moments" and then is perfectly fine. So, after she purged and he left, we talked for a bit and then she was fine.
SO came home a few hours later and we talked some more. Going to get her back into counseling. She doesn't think I stick up for her like her step-mom does for her girls. But the thing is, step-mom just blurts things out and they argue. I wait and talke to SO in private. But my DD doesn't believe me, and thinks I am not on her side.
SO is actually handling it quite well, and understand she just kind of had to puke all of this out, and we are glad she was honest, but of course it still hurts.
What is interesting, is she isn't saying she wants us to breakup, she just doesn't want him living "with us." She also admited that she wishes things were less "strict" (like she knows what strict really is).
Anyways, I could go on and on with details. Not sure how many of you hear walked through this with kids, especially girls. My older two had a rough go with DD12 dad, but when there dad died at ages 8 and 11, there was no where else to go. Plus, there dad was not very involved in the first place.
Any experience would be appreciated.