Hello everyone. I am new to the boards and have been reading for hours. I feel better already, but I'm just not sure which board fits me best. Here's a link to my incredibly long initial post if you're interested:
I haven't received very many responses to that post, but I do realize that lots of people don't care to read a post that long. I just had to get it all out there. Besides, it was THE BEST therapy. It was painful to reminisce, though.
Like everyone else who is here, I just need all the support I can get. I have found lots of great advice already, and I am so grateful.
It has been 3 weeks since I last saw/talked to my AP and 8 whole days since I attempted to contact him. I know 8 days doesn't sound like much, but it is truly a personal record. I miss him tremendously, but I realize that as long as he is out of the picture, my relationship with H gets closer and closer to what I want it to be.
I miss his friendship more than anything. We had a very strong emotional bond. It has been a year since we entered into a full-blown affair, almost two years since we started communicating on a regular basis as "friends." He abruptly ended contact with me on several occasions (see my initial post via the link), most recently three weeks ago. No explanation whatsoever. One day, I heard "I love you" more times than I could count, and the next, I heard nothing.
Now that I've made up my mind that it's finally over, I feel like a huge part of me is missing. I truly love this man, but I know I'm doing the right thing. It's just so hard because there wasn't an "end" that was agreed upon. It just stopped.
If he decides to contact me, what do I do? Do I just ignore him like he has me or do I respond to tell him to leave me alone? I really hate this. I was so stupid to let myself fall.