I am a heterosexual woman who is married. Let me just say before I make myself sound like the worst person in the world our marriage has been on the rocks for a long time due to his alcholism. We've been going to counseling and he has started AA/NA. He's already been to rehab and when he came home he relapsed for a period of 8 months (sneaking around behind my back and doing it). I'm trying to make it work, but recently I've started to develop feelings for a friend of mine and yes it's a woman. I have no idea how to even process these feelings, what any of it means or where to go from here. A part of me wants to tell her, but I value our friendship. I also don't want to walk away from my marriage or even put it in danger if I'm just having a freak out from all that's going on in my own life.
I tried to talk to my husband about my sexual orientation crisis, but he just became devastated and I quickly back tracked.
I can't really talk to my friends or family. The only person I told about this suggested I see where it goes and if it feels right then I have my answer, but I'm just not sure if it's the right decision for me.
I'm so lost and confused.
Side note the woman I've developed feelings for is twice my senior.