I slept good again, still not feeling the sorrow I'm expecting. We haven't gone two hours without talking in so long let alone two days.
So a bit about what I've been going through for months I've been i guess maybe depressed, could sleep all day or at least lay in bed, didn't do much around the house my bedroom became where i lived unless i was seeing him that is. I was stuck maybe in this limbo waiting for him to leave for us to start. Start what I'm married to what did i think i was starting'. I couldn't sleep at night God what a mess, my bills and budget are a mess, my house is surfaced clean but if you really look omg. I've gained probably twenty l bs and i was gym nut. All i felt stress and anxiety sprinkled with moments of good that didn't last. I hope I'm ok and not a mess right now cuz I'm just done period. Scared the heart break its coming.