I have a friend that I feel is always trying to control me. Anytime someone we know is in the hospital, ill, had a car accident, she writes me an email saying "you really should send them a card". I am sympathetic but I do not like being TOLD what to do by someone else. I do send out cards and gifts to people from time to time, depending on my schedule and funds. I just do not like being TOLD to do something. That is the issue. Additionally, some of these people she tells me to send cards to are people I barely know. She told me to buy a graduation gift for a friend's daughter, I've never met the daughter. That's just one example. What is a polite way to tell someone that they should not be instructing you to do things?