Hello everyone. I'm new here but so deeply hoping for an understanding ear and shoulder. I'm going to post my full story a little later but right now I just would like to know if anyone has actually divorced their spouse for AP but has been torn between the two? I'm 37 female with 3 children and was married 18 years. This is the first week back with XH and I'm falling apart. I know I came back for the kids only and I'm struggling so very much. I miss my love (AP) and I know I could never, ever be happy with XH again. I just have so desperately missed my kids and I need emotional help dealing with it all. If anyone could help me please I would be so thankful!