I've been lurking here for several months, but Asperger's has been a part of our lives for several years (no confirmed dx). Partially my fault because I haven't been able to acquire insurance. Partially because the small school he was attending did not have the resources to help him.
Josh turned 10 on 4/25. He just finished 4th grade - reads at about an 8th grade level, can do multiplication and division in his head, solves story problems in his head, and all in all is (to quote his teacher) "a very bright child". However, his social skills are dismal - he plays around other kids, not with them. Has no desire for team sports, but loves tae kwon do, and excelled in it before we had to drop out because of money problems. His handwriting and motor skills are delayed, and he worked with an OT at school one day a week to help with this. I honestly don't see much improvement - his kindy brother's handwriting and art projects could be interchangeable with Josh's. He obsesses with video games, and currently is fixated on his new pet turtle. In the past it's been water towers, windmills, etc. A simple "It works because..." does not do it for him as an answer - he wants details. When he's happy he often flaps his hands instead of laughing. When he's angry he turns into a feral child and grunts and claws at people. He stays with my father during the day while I work - my father volunteers for a heart rehab clinic and takes Josh with him. Josh will sit for 2-3 hours with his gameboy or a book and be so quiet that people forget he's there.
My ex-husband and I have split custody of his two half brothers, so there is a lot of turmoil in our house. The younger two are here for two weeks, then gone for two weeks in the summer, and during the school year we alternate weekends.
Josh has said that he "hates" his brothers because they are noisy and loud and make his head hurt. When they are here his negative behavior intensifies immensely. He does not grasp the concept of punishment for negative actions - time outs for tantrums and such do not work, nor do removing priviledges. They just cause MORE tantrums and negative behaviors (for instance, last weekend when he was sent to bed early for a serious misbehavior, he reacted by punching his bedroom window).
We recently moved and he will be starting a new school in the fall with more resources (IE a special needs teacher ON STAFF) - how do I approach the school with my concerns? I have not been able to get his doctor to refer us for a psych eval - because when he's at the doctor's he acts like a "normal, quiet child". His second grade teacher suggested it, but his teachers now (different school) don't think he has any problems other than being quiet and shy and having lousy handwriting. FWIW, his current school (not the one we're switching to) has VERY small class sizes - 18-20 per class plus teacher and parapro, and is half Amish - so noise and misbehaviors are not a problem in his classroom.
His brothers are 6.5 (lives with his father) and 3.5 (lives with me).
Am I correct in thinking I may have an Aspie on my hands?
Mommy to Josh (10), William (6.5) and Ryan (3.5)