Private-Private: Yours may not be an especially deep friendship, but the two of you are definitely comfortable together -- you're on the same communication wavelength. "The less disclosure the better" is your mutual motto. If you're close, it's probably because you have a shared history or have important interests in common. But most likely, yours is more of a casual friendship. While neither of you is itching for lots of sharing and caring from the other, if you want to get closer, it's time to test your trust and open up.
Private-Listener: Listener and Private are pretty incompatible when it comes to in-depth communication, but that doesn't mean you don't have plenty of other reasons for being buddies. Just because you two aren't spilling your juiciest stories and secrets doesn't mean your friendship is lacking. There are friends you tell all to, others you tell intimacies to selectively, and still others with whom you share very little emotionally and instead share hobbies and activities. That said, while friends should respect each other's privacy, willingness to share, especially to share personal information about oneself, is a basic feature of friendship, says Florence Isaacs, author of Toxic Friends, True Friends: How Your Friends Can Make or Break Your Health, Happiness, Family, and Career. So it may be time for the two of you to test your trust and disclose more.
Private-Reliable Advisor: What a frustrating friendship -- for the Reliable Advisor anyway. Most likely, the Reliable Advisor will be frustrated and even annoyed by the lack of shared intimacies from the Private (offering advice is the Reliable Advisor's specialty and a great source of her self-esteem as well). Your only hope for continued friendship is that you share hobbies and activities instead of juicy secrets. With common interests to keep you close, you may just make it.
Private-Chatterbox: Just because the Chatterbox is ready to chat just about anytime doesn't mean Private is too. Chatterbox must respect Private's, well, privacy. It's also important for Chatterbox to look out for Private's feelings and be careful not to intrude or force intimate conversation Private isn't ready for. If that leaves Chatterbox feeling frustrated and left out in the cold, that could spell the end of the friendship. For her part, Private may want to test the friendship by confiding an unimportant secret and see whether it is kept or spread around by Chatterbox, advises Jan Yager, Ph.D., author of Friendshifts: The Power of Friendship and How It Shapes Our Lives.