Gail Liberman and Alan Lavine on Love, Marriage and Money

A_M_C: How do you bring up that one to your significant other though with out it being a hot topic?
GailAlan: It's tough. You need to set a time to talk. Express your need as a feeling. "I feel we need to discuss our account arrangement," for example. Also, listen carefully to what your spouse has to say in response.
A_M_C: That will work.
GailAlan: Make sure that no matter how much you disagree, you need to tell your husband you have a problem. Set a time to meet only to discuss that issue. Tell him it's important for you to resolve this problem. Be careful about this, though. Often, husbands like to unwind after work. So you need to respect that. A good time to talk might be when you go for a walk, for example. Men like to talk when they're in motion -- ironically. By the way, that was Al talking about the husband's point of view. Does he realize your need to ask? If so, you might have him role-play with you in the house.
OP_Temom: I want my husband to ask for potential raise and promotion. How should I get him to go for it?
GailAlan: Practice different ways he might approach his boss and ask for a raise.
You need to express to him that you want him to ask for a raise and why. You might tell him why it's important for your family. Also, you might tell him how much you feel he deserves it. Again, ask to have a meeting with him on an issue that's been bothering you. Perhaps, you can go for a walk and bring up your concerns. Men tend to be more understanding when you explain you need their help to understand something that's bothering you.

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