Don't Be a Love Junkie
Q: In your book, Real Moments, you wrote that happiness only comes from having enough of these moments in your life. What are "real moments"?
A: They're basically moments in which you're in touch with the meaning of life, when your relationship to the rest of the universe makes sense. I think there are always moments of connection
Q: Is this why we have so many love junkies? In the first flush of romance, we experience a lot of real moments.
A: Yes, that's a good point. Your ability to love deeply, to experience the richness of life, does temporarily become enhanced when you first fall in love. Suddenly flowers become more beautiful, and everything is more wonderful. "Finally," you think, "I've met someone without any stuff!" Nobody has any flaws
In a relationship, if both people are thinking, "I want you to make me happy," at some point they're going to disappoint each other greatly. Not that you shouldn't try to make your partner happy, and shouldn't try to treat your partner well, but the true happiness that allows us to feel a sense of peace comes from within ourselves. So if you think your husband or girlfriend is going to do it for you, you're going to end up resenting the hell out of them because they can't do it, they just can't. And two people who aren't satisfied with themselves, who aren't both looking into themselves, aren't going to make a relationship with a strong foundation.