Get Organized Chat Transcript: February 17, 2004


iVillager heidismile: How do I avoid nagging? For example, DH wants me to find a job. I agreed, but I need everyone to pick up after himself. Don't yell at DS for leaving his plate on the table and then leave your plate there. DH denied doing that and has since done that a number of times. When he leaves the table, I ask him to come back to take care of his plate. He says he will and then forgets about it. I end up nagging him about it. What should I do?

Regina Leeds: Heidi, I don't know that I have the answer but I will toss out some ideas. When it comes to children, repetition is going to be necessary. Children don't "get" things the way adults do. I remember my very organized mother saying to me: 'Why do I have to repeat myself?" With adults very often other things are being worked out or played through the drama of every day things. So my hunch is that when your husband constantly forgets to clear his plate it's about something else, and what that is I am not qualified to guess, nor do I have enough information. I really feel you both need some couples counseling. From my perspective you are one of the sweetest human beings God ever created. I "get" from you over the years that you care deeply about your husband and your son. So I can't imagine why your DH can't take a dish off the table. Now it may be the way he was raised. He may have observed that his mother "served" his father in the home and it may be difficult for him to balance what he expects and what is reality for society today.

iVillager cl-fire_bug: I'm still looking for ideas for storing toys. DD just had her first birthday and she has even more toys now. I'm planning on taking some to my parents and in-laws for her to play with there, but my house isn't that big and her toys are.

Regina Leeds: The phrase "an embarrassment of riches" comes to mind. I wonder if some of the biggest toys could be stored at the homes of those in-laws who gave them to her? Perhaps they would think twice before they gave you a life-size Mickey Mouse if they knew that Mickey would be living with them! And you think I am being flip, don't you? Girl, this is exactly what I would do: They would all be storing those giants at their homes! Do you have an attic or garage? Well, you can always set aside some storage space and roate her toys. But truly Amy some people mean well when they offer these giant toys. Give them the toys to keep at their homes until the basement is done. That will sound way more gracious! And she will have toys wherever she goes. I should be so lucky.

iVillager ktjm3: When my kids were little and well-endowed with toys, we got seven Rubbermaid tubs, filled them with toys and then during quiet days, we got out one box of toys and "rediscovered" them.

iVillager jo_ann_b: I read someplace about someone who put a note on invitations that gift would be donated to a charity.

iVillager ktjm3: We had that problem with some toys, and I just put away the less loved toys (ones that were ignored), and got them out on days when there was just "nothing to play with".

iVillager cl-piquant1: Any suggestions on what to do for really deep high cabinets to make them more user friendly?

Regina Leeds: You might want to put in a shelf that you can purchase at a store like Bed Bath & Beyond. This will give you levels or you could put in a tray that slides out, so the contents come out to you. Where are these cabinets?

iVillager cl-piquant1: Above my oven, up near the ceiling.

Regina Leeds: Oh! Those caverns above the stove! I know them well. Yeah, those shelves you can put in are great. They are white and come in various depths. That's a great place for huge serving pieces that you bring out only periodically.

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