Give Nerds a Chance

Looking for a nice guy?

No, you're not. Not according to DoubleYourDating.com and AskMen.com. These sites, and dozens like them, say that what women really want are jerks who will treat them badly.

Where do men get crazy ideas like this?

From us! Because women go out with jerks and ignore the good guys. I should know. I stayed with a man for years who treated me badly. That is the source of my Grrl Genius expertise in sex and relationships. I learned from failure. I screwed up, so you won't have to.

These men's sites both have features on how guys can actually learn to be more jerk-esque so that women will want to go out with them. They advise tactics such as the "Funny Cocky Method" (no, this is not some strange sexual maneuver, although it makes me giggle every time I type it), where the author teaches men how to stop being so "wussy" (aka nice and caring) and how to be more "funny and cocky" (aka jerky), because he has discovered that women love it.

Why are women attracted to jerks?

I often look to nature for answers to these kinds of complex questions. My fascination with animal behavior stems mostly from a crush I had on Jim, the sexy dart-gun guy in khaki shorts on Mutual of Omaha's Wild Kingdom.

In the real wild kingdom, there are some examples of female animals choosing the most aggressive, or "jerky," males for mating. And it's interesting to note that many species where females choose aggressive men are now going extinct, such as the English songbird, the rare "great tit" (true name, you can look it up).

Frankly, I'm not that big a fan of great tits (though they seem to be thriving here in Los Angeles). If they are stupid enough to choose jerky males for mating, they deserve to be extinct. There are many more successful species in the animal kingdom where the females choose their mates for qualities other than being jerks. Guppies, for example, seek mates with the most red spots, which might not seem like that great a quality, but hey, when you're a guppy there's not that much to go on. Still, marrying a guppy with cute red spots seems smarter than marrying a guppy who says that yes, your ass does look fat in those fins.

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