The White Zinfandel
It shouldn't shock you if when you tell people you're dating a white zinfandel they look surprised and say, "Oh really? You're dating so-and-so? Wow, honey, she's dating so-and-so! Huh. How's about that!"
It will all make sense in a few years when you, your white zinfandel and his boyfriend are having brunch together and laughing hysterically about the fact that you two ever dated in the first place.
Wine comparisons aside, Jen, David and I really did have a lovely merlot while we were touring the vineyards. Heck, we even had a nice white zinfandel. My favorite, though, was the pinotage, though I've heard they'll break your heart every time.