He's Republican, She's Democrat: 23 Ways to Make Love and Politics Work

Research suggests women are more liberal than the men they love. In fact, the Center for Policy Alternatives, a nonpartisan policy group, reports that if only women's votes were counted in the 2000 presidential election, Al Gore would have won by a landslide with 402 electoral votes! And the responses from a recent survey taken at iVillage support these stats. According to the women who post on the Relationships channel message boards, most tend to vote democrat while their SOs are generally more conservative. But each had a uniqe opinion about what role political opinions play in marriage. Read their tips on the place political debates have at home, and when leaving your opinion at the polls is your best bet.

"He's a Republican, I'm a Democrat. This makes for interesting discussions around election time, but he thinks we shouldn't discuss politics for the most part. But I like the spirited discussions so when there are major things going on, I have to discuss them -- with him! --kd1100

"My husband and I pretty much have the same ideas when it comes to politics. When we do disagree, I don't think it hurts our relationship, in fact I think it makes it better. Could you imagine what the world would be like if we all agreed on the same issues? Pretty dull. -- cl-smiley66

"We rarely disagree, but when we do it usually leads to a very heated debate which tends to turn us both on! Before things get ugly politics are usually forgotten." --momofzoeanddan

"The lack of political discussion between me and my husband is most likely the reason why we've been married so long." --twoki

"To avoid arguments, we don't discuss politics." --t.e.r.r.i

"My husband and I have lively discussions, but no anger. I think he has become a little more liberal in his thinking since we have been together, and I have become slightly conservative on some issues." --ellenleora

"My husband and I agree about 90% of the time, but my parents were on opposite ends of the political spectrum leading to very lively discussions. --libraone

"My husband and I seem to agree on issues, and I'm glad about that. We usually vote Democrat, together. Or we get the same "feeling" when we hear a politician speak. The party issues are a real factor with us, too. --by cl-sweetpea1946

"We usually agree on big issues, but have been known to "cancel out each other's votes" at the polls. We enjoy having political discussions, and even tease each other as we discuss things. It's never a nasty debate." --tswalnut

"We hardly ever agree unless we're discussing military issues which we both have a mutual interest in. We handle the disagreements by respecting each other's opinions -- even when we are shouting those opinions at each other, LOL" --jlwhitmore

"Politics is one area that my husband and I totally agree on. It's really great because we are both very interested in the issues. We can get pretty hot about some of them, but we are almost always in agreement. I actually can't remember disagreeing politically in our entire 30 years together. -- cl-taurus29

"I love cerebral discussions, especially about politics. My husband and I have opposing views on some issues. He is what I would call a right wing Independent (conservative) and I'm a liberal Republican. We love to discourse about politicians, issues and hot topics of the day. Most of the time, neither one of us is swayed by the other's point of view, and I don't think we want to, but the stimulating discussions are energizing. It shows that although personality wise darling husband and I are opposites, at the cerebral level we are on the same plane. I find this very sexy actually, the mental stimulation." --falcon58

"We tend to agree, but if we don't then we usually agree to disagree. When we're with my in-laws, on the other hand, everyone has a different viewpoint which makes for lively discussions during the holidays. It can be great fun! --lynnlydia

"I'm very liberal, and my husband who is in the military tends to be more conservative. Since we know we won't agree, we agree not to talk about it." --mommy_to_garrett

"I love discussing politics with my husband for two reasons. One is that he teaches me so much. More importantly, when we do disagree, he doesn't argue with me or try to change my opinion, he just appreciates my point of view." -- k_m_r_s

"We discuss politics, but we don't always agree. Opposite parties and I'm more liberal. When we get to that point, we wonder how we managed to marry one another! LOL. Seriously, we have opposing views on important issues but don't let it damage our relationship. Sometimes that's because I can make a persuasive argument, and get him to see my views! Other times, he can show me the light of the other side." -- cl-rose1018

"My husband isn't as interested in the whole political process as I am, but we usually get into interesting debates around election time. My in-laws are "rabid" party members. I used to keep quiet about my views just to keep the peace, but now I'm speaking out more. It's lively!" -- kmheart79

"When my husband and I met, I was much farther to the left politically then I am now. And he was much farther to the right than he is now. Through discussion (and real life experience), both of us have come closer to the center. My dad always told me that once I had more life experience I'd lose some of my idealism, and sure enough, I did. My husband was so conservative. His attitudes have changes somewhat too. I think I can take partial credit for that. Since we agree on our life goals and how we choose to live day to day, I can't imagine us letting our political views get between us. Sometimes it's fun to get into a heated "discussion" but that's about as far as it goes."--bnearing

"My husband and I come from different socio-economic and ethnic places, but we fall into a similar political category. It's interesting to see where his opinon comes from, and we end up discussing the small differences in our beliefs. Amazingly, at the end of a discussion, we each usually "sway" the other's (opposite) side." -- jc2717

"My boyfriend was in the military for ten years so he tends to be more conservative than I am. If he were extreme, it would never work, but our differences are workable. We agree on core issues, but disagree on methods of getting them." -- rhiannon_920

"My husband and I have an agreement that we agree to disagree on issues, that neither opinion is wrong, and we need to listen to the other person. This has prevented most arguments; therefore politics doesn?t affect our marriage. We do enough other (stupid) things to affect our marriage! LOL --ccwsmw

And two iVillage men say?.

" I am the more politically minded partner in my marriage, and I share my views with my wife. Most of the time she agrees, but on the rare occassion when she doesn't we discuss our perspective, and usually end up with a big kiss and hug. It makes me love her even more knowing that we can disagree on some things and still feel secure in our relationship." -- bowdaddy

"My wife and I have very similar political views, but occasionally she will support one candidate and I another. I respect her views and she respects mine, so we never argue about politics even if we disagree once in a while." -- gigi_1000

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