How do I ask him out?
Does anyone have any advice on how to ask a guy out? I met a man in a business meeting last week. I've been widowed for almost five years and have gone on a few dates in that time (they asked me out). I'm 36 and attractive, but I'm also insecure and nervous about asking men out. We did flirt and seemed to connect during this meeting. Help! --B
Question:Sherry Amatenstein
Sherry is the author of The Q&A Dating Book and Love Lessons from Bad Breakups. She has taught dating seminars, appeared as an expert... Read more
Dear B:
Why not call to comment on something astute or smartly humorous he said in the business meeting? After he soaks up the ego stroke, add that you would love to further pick his brain over coffee if he has the time. Whether he sees through your ruse or not, I will bet that he'll instantly write you into his date book.
Once you get together, you'll be able to surmise whether or not he likes you -- or just likes you liking him -- by how interested he seems in your life. For example, does he compliment you on your appearance, ask "casual" questions to determine whether you're available for romance, wonder what kinds of activities you enjoy in your spare time? Or is his eagerness at seeing you centered primarily on acting the professional mentor?
Even if this date turns out to be all she wrote, revel in the fact that you showed initiative and grabbed the bull by the horns, even if he did back away from the red cape. You already know you're attractive; to glean the knowledge that you have the confidence to make the first move will be a giant step toward overcoming your insecurity.
Answer:
