How Guys Get Confident: iVillage.com

The fragile Confidence Chain is made up of seven key elements:

  1. State of mind
  2. Physical appearance
  3. Style
  4. Listening skills
  5. Volatility
  6. Practice
  7. Financial stability

In order to reach a state of 100 percent confidence, you must learn to incorporate, monitor, adjust, adapt and balance all seven elements within your daily routine. The moment you stop, everything can come crashing down with a comment as simple as, "You're not my type." Now I'm not suggesting that you need to be 100 percent confident 100 percent of the time in order to be happy and successful with the ladies. But be aware that the higher you are on the confidence meter, the higher your success rate with women will be. When you adopt the CC philosophy, your body and mind will begin changing their physiology to better adapt to the current environment — regardless of whether it's a positive or negative one.

How to Get Confidence

It's important to realize that all seven elements need not be executed to completion in order to exude confidence. However, if you want to be at your highest level possible, you need to ensure that all seven elements are equally balanced.

1. State of mind

The very first step toward becoming a confident person involves building confidence from the inside on a daily basis through introspection. You're going to have to help yourself by adopting a confidence-building philosophy. What does this mean? By creating thoughts and exercises of confidence, your body will react and display that confidence. But before you can get there, you need to take a deep, honest look at yourself. You need to learn to feed off your strengths and eliminate — or at least minimize — your weaknesses. For example, if you think that stuttering when you're nervous is one weakness that contributes to your lack of confidence, then practice speaking with as many people (preferably women) as possible until you eliminate that drawback.

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