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I recall experiencing several overwhelming urges after the births of my children: The desire to sleep, the hankering for a glass of wine, the yearning to go to the bathroom without feeling like my nether regions were on bloody fire. The one thing I didn't fancy anytime soon? The very act that got me into those messes in the first place: Sex.
A new body of research suggests I might be in the minority. A study reported on LiveScience.com has found that lots of women report feeling frisky long before their doctors give the go-ahead at six weeks postpartum. More than a quarter of them do the deed, while a whopping 40 percent masturbate! Who are these aliens, I mean women? Was this study conducted after the publication of Fifty Shades of Grey?
I mean, honestly. Between the hormonal roller-coaster, the leaking, rock-hard boobs and the crippling sleep deprivation, I don't know how any new mom manages to feel frisky -- or generous. (The researchers admit that some of these superwives are simply sensitive to their partners' desperate sexual needs, although apparently many fledgling moms just can’t resist the urge to get busy for purely carnal reasons.)
While I firmly believe Mother Nature, in Her infinite wisdom, allows women to dial those particular feelings way down for a reason, I applaud (and secretly envy) the women who still want to go at it in those early weeks and months. To the rest of you (read: us), I can offer the gentle assurance that if you're not feeling the love, don’t sweat it. You will again, rest assured. (The "rest" part being key.)
Here's how long other iVillage moms waited (or didn't) before getting busy:
"One week after my first cesarean...and after my second, we didn't touch each other for fear of getting pregnant again!" -- Heather
"Until I felt human again..." -- Lisa
"3 weeks." -- Diana
"I waited 6 weeks after baby number one. But after baby number two? It was months before I felt like having sex again!" -- Erica
"First baby: 6 weeks; Second baby: 4 weeks; Third baby: 1 week." -- Laura
"We waited 12 weeks, even though my doctor gave the go-ahead at 10 weeks." -- Sara