I'm already sick of Jon Gosselin and his new girlfriend -- and we've only known about her for like 3 days.
"Hailey and I have been family friends for several years and only very recently began dating," Jon reveals to the mag. "What began as friendship has grown into something more. I genuinely enjoy spending time with her. It's nice to be with someone who I can confide in and trust and who accepts me for who I am."
Can someone say "ouch!"?
Jon is also trying to make us believe that he is slightly tortured by the media attention poor little Hailey is going to get by dating someone of his reality TV caliber.
"I know that my decision to appear publicly with Hailey this weekend will be scrutinized, but I hope that people can see I'm a regular guy who is going through a very difficult time in [my] life and wants to move forward."
And FYI, though In Touch is saying that Jon & Hailey are talking marriage already, the soon-to-be designer says it's really not that serious.
"No. We're just having a cool time and enjoying each other," Jon said.
The words "enjoying each other" makes me throw up a little in mouth.
UPDATE: A "source" for E! Online says that Jon has actually bought a ring for Hailey and the two are engaged -- but, of course, it's all totally on the down-low.
"They're engaged but nobody is allowed to say. They've been warned to keep it secret," the very-trusty insider said.
Take this whole thing with a grain of salt, people. Until we see Kate shopping for eight little ring bearer outfits, I won't be holding my breath.