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Jon Gosselin would like us to believe that he's seen the error of his ways.
In front of a full house at NYC's West Side Jewish Center Sunday night, the reality star tried to portray himself as man who was simply overwhelmed by his sudden fame. "I think I'm just misunderstood. I'm not a fame seeker," Jon said. "Everyday I look in the mirror and I wonder [why I'm famous]. I don't sing. I don't dance. I'm not a Nobel Peace Prizewinner. I just had eight kids, and I had a show on TLC."
Under the guidance of Rabbi Shmuley Boteach, Jon says that he's realized that certain decisions he made while still married to Kate Gosselin may have not been the smartest moves to make. "Half the stuff I've done, if I look at my moral compass, I shouldn't have done," he said. "I know that but I did it anyway. It's like fame canceled out conviction."
Jon also used the forum as an opportunity to say he was sorry to his soon-to-be-ex. "I want to apologize to Kate in private," he said. "I'll apologize to her for openly having relationships in the public eye. That was a huge mistake, because if she would've done that to me, I would have been extremely pissed off. Not because our relationship is over, it's almost like a stab in the back. And now that I think about it, it was a very wrong thing to do. I definitely regret it."
Jon admitted that he and girlfriend Hailey Glassman, "should never have gone to France."
Despite rumors that Jon and Hailey are over, Jon says they are still together – they are just trying to take it easy. "We decided not to take a break, just slow things down, until I get through my divorce and I know everything is settled and okay," he explained. "I don't want another failure in my relationships. I don't want to make the same mistakes I made with Kate, with Hailey. I would just be repeating the pattern over again."
He even says that he wasn't upset by Hailey's interview with The Insider, in which she claimed that the dad was emotionally abusive towards her. "I was standing right there. Mike [Gosselin's manager] was standing right there," Gosselin said. "He was looking at me like, 'Oh my god, what is she saying?' He's looking at my career going down the tubes, and I'm thinking, 'Good for her, she got all of this out.'"
He added, "I have to be accountable for my actions. Maybe she used the wrong terminology, but she's 22, that's what she knew. Those are the words and that's how she felt."
Also in response to his girlfriend's shocking statements, Jon told Entertainment Tonight, "I will forever love Hailey. I see how all this has truly hurt her. She has not been happy and hates the media light that she has been put in. She is in no way a homewrecker."
"Hailey says she thinks it's a good idea that we both take some time right now and focus on each of our individual lives," Gosselin told ET. "It is important for me to go back to Pennsylvania and be with my children and get through this divorce and decide what I truly want out of life. I do love her and care deeply. She has made me realize I can love myself and just need to be more honest. I am taking things day by day."
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