The Paula Abdul stories are the most debasing of any about the Idol crew. In December 2004, she was "caught in a hit and run" -- literally -- when she was charged with fleeing the scene of an accident on an L.A. freeway. A year later, she skirted past security at the Las Vegas airport, irking the fine folks from Homeland Security. Then there are the alleged substance abuse issues... not to mention the sex scandal with a contestant from the second season. (More on that later!) We'll drink to Paula pulling it together.