Photo Credit: Vanity Fair
In an interview with Vanity Fair that she gave before paying her penance, the actress revealed that she blames her trouble on a combination of having poor role models, an erratic father and, yes, even her own bad judgement.
"I was irresponsible," Lohan says of her multiple DUI arrests and car wrecks. " And I'm not making excuses." But the starlet says it was the lack of discipline during her formative years that led her down a dark path.
Lohan says part of her problem was that the tabloids were her single news source -- a fact she now calls "scary and sad."
"I would look up to those girls … the Britneys and whatever. And I would be like, I want to be like that," she admits.
"I didn't have any structure. In the beginning, I had structure, and then I lost all the structure in my life. I think a lot of it was because when I was doing my first slew of movies, it was very go-go, and I had a lot of responsibility, and I think just the second I didn't have [structure] anymore -- I was 18, 19 -- with a ton of money."
But Lohan says she was just like any other teen, except that every step she took was chronicled by the media.
"These were my college years … but they were in the public eye," she says. "I was irresponsible. I was experimenting. I was doing certain things that people do 10 times more of when they're in college."
Lohan owns up to her faults but firmly denies having a drug or alcohol problem. "I've never abused prescription drugs," she says. "I never have -- never in my life. I have no desire to. That's not who I am. I've admitted to the things that I've done. To, you know, dabbling in certain things and trying things 'cause I was young and curious and thought it was like, OK, 'cause other people were doing it and other people put it in front of me. And I see what happened in my life because of it."
"I'm a completely different person now," she adds.
"I want my career back," Lohan says. "I know that I'm a damn good actress, and it's been my passion since I was a child, and I know that when I care about something, I put 100 percent and more into it."