Living Together: Organizing Your Bedroom Before Your Boyfriend Moves In

I have a small bedroom that has a lot of clutter. My boyfriend will be living with me soon and I really need a complete overhaul. How can I make this small living space turn into a more inviting space for two? --iVillager Bunny

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Inviting someone into our life to share our space is an opportunity for a great adventure. We need to realize, however, that the physical space must be prepared for the transition. Love is the most powerful force in the world, but it doesn't clean out closets, move furniture or toss outdated clothing and papers.

First, clean out whatever does not belong in your bedroom. This means getting rid of old magazines, newspapers or clothes you no longer wear and taking any items that do not belong in your bedroom to their proper location. Once the space is thinned out, you'll want to start organizing what's left over.

Why is this an important process? Because your environment acts as an unspoken message about how you feel about yourself. A welcoming bedroom will reveal that you are able to nurture yourself through your environment. Believe it or not, your boy friend will unconsciously deduce that you will nurture him as well. I don't mean this in the 1950s sense of waiting on him hand and foot.

But by organizing your bedroom before he moves in with you, you can show him that your home is a haven from the struggles of the world beyond your front door. We all long for a sanctuary. And as we all know, it has traditionally been the province of the woman to create it.


Once you've gotten rid of the clutter, here's how you can transition from my space to our space:

  • Organize your closet and create adequate space for your boyfriend. Take a look at his wardrobe before he moves in so you have an idea about how much space he'll need.
  • Be sure you have a night table on either side of the bed. Everyone needs a light, a book or a glass of water.
  • If he likes to read, clear off space in your bedroom bookcase for some of his favorite reading matter.
  • Remove any signs of previous relationships. This includes old love letters and photographs of good times with old boyfriends.
  • Be sure the decor isn't too feminine, otherwise he will feel uncomfortable. This is a good time to invest in new bedding and towels.
  • Remember to clean out your bathroom and clear some space for his things. Check out his current bathroom setup to get an idea of what his space needs are.
  • If you have animals, help them make the transition. Dogs and cats frequently feel displaced and get depressed when someone new moves into a bedroom they are used to sharing with their "human mother." If necessary, chat with your vet to help guide your actions.
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