Lure of the Married Man

Quick: What do dating a married man and devouring a hot fudge sundae loaded with almonds, whipped cream and lots of sauce have in common? Both taste devilishly good, and both are sinfully bad for you.

Sure, it's human nature to want what you shouldn't have. But while the ice cream concoction might expand your hips, loving someone else's man can contort your heart in ways that are infinitely more disturbing than a little weight gain -- and much harder to bounce back from.

Drama Mama

So what's the draw? If it's fear of commitment that compels you to seek out men with wedding rings on their fingers, I suggest that you prepare for some major bumps on your thrill ride. If you're simply blinded by love, I predict you'll be seeing clearly when you're spending the majority of your Saturday nights alone waiting to see if he can sneak out and see you.

When you date a married man, you're forever stuck in the "newbie" stage of a relationship -- that roller-coaster, tummy-turning period composed of equal parts excitement, fear, fury and bone-deep misery. You've got high highs (think happy drunk) and low lows (think apres-buzz). More soap opera appeal: There's the excitement of the chase, the mystery of not knowing (can he see me tonight? Am I better in bed than his wife?), and loads of free time to pursue your own thing. The catch-22 on the last "plus": You've got loads of free time to obsess about this frustrating love affair.

Queen of Denial

Many women who succumb to the lure of the married man say, "Oh, I can handle it. I won't fall in love." Uh, huh. And rain isn't wet. When you sleep with someone you care about, he doesn't just enter your body; he enters you. And you inevitably want more. Only the more you want, the less he gives. (Gotta spend some time with the wife so she doesn't get suspicious. Junior has a soccer match, and Dad's his biggest fan.) And let's not forget the "once a cheater, always a cheater" factor. I don't think I need to expand on this point, because we've all heard it before. Just think about it.

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