Marriage Makeover: The Surrendered Wife

Excerpted from The Surrendered Wife

In her controversial book, The Surrendered Wife, Laura Doyle advises women to give up control in their marriages to revive intimacy. Is this a flash back to the 1950s or a new way of looking at the modern marriage? Take a look at our guide to surrendering, then, try it for yourself, with Laura's 5 Ways to Surrender.

What it is:

  • Relinquishing inappropriate control over your husband by respecting your husband's intelligence (e.g. an adult can pick out his own clothing in the morning)
  • Receiving gifts from your husband graciously and expressing gratitude to him -- say "thank you" to compliments; let him know he is valued
  • Expressing what you want without demanding your husband's compliance -- express your desires and see how your mate tries to fulfill them
  • Trusting your husband with household finances -- appeal to his desire to take care of you while you relinquish stress over money and bills
  • Focusing on your own self-care and fulfillment -- patience and compassion for your husband come from your own rest, relaxation and support system

What it's not:

  • Rejecting feminism or returning to the 1950s housewife ideal
  • Becoming subservient
  • Observing rigid gender roles
  • Losing your identity as an intelligent individual within the home or without
  • Submitting to emotional or physical abuse, or persevering in a chronically unfaithful relationship
  • Losing dignity or social independence

Would you consider surrendering? Take a look at these 5 Ways to Surrender

Read more about Laura Doyle.


Not interested in surrendering, but looking for a change in your relationship?
Check out guest expert Kathy Dawson's Practical Solutions for Your Marriage, then try it for yourself with her 5 New Ways to Make it Work

Ever wish you could just take a break from your relationship -- to pursue your dreams, travel or just relax? Take a look at our guide to a Marriage Sabbatical.

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