Meeting His Parents -- and Making an Impression
I have been dating my Mr. Perfect for two months now. We are both crazy in love with each other. I think he may be The One. He wants me to meet his parents this weekend at their home, and I am very nervous. They're in their late 60s, and I'm afraid we won't have anything in common. Plus, I have a five-year-old from my previous marriage, and I'm afraid they may look negatively on this. What can I do to impress them? What is a good conversation opener? I can't help but feel the urge to go in there and confess my eternal devotion to their son and thank them endlessly for raising such a wonderful man! --dwiliams
Question:Sherry Amatenstein
Sherry is the author of The Q&A Dating Book and Love Lessons from Bad Breakups. She has taught dating seminars, appeared as an expert... Read more
Dear dwiliams:
While I commend you for wanting to make a good impression on the folks you hope will one day be your in-laws, I caution you not to go overboard in your desire to prove to them whatever it is you feel you need to prove. In such circumstances, less is definitely more. Be understated and sweetly shy (if that's not too far from your usual personality). Be sure to walk in bearing a small gift, such as flowers or cookies. Feel free to offer a sincere but casual compliment on their home. You might even ask to see childhood pictures of your boyfriend, if you're sure that won't make him uncomfortably embarrassed. If you're served a meal, offer to help clear the table. In general, though, let them take the conversational lead. While you may not have a lot in common with them given their age, you do share a love for their son. I'm sure you'll find plenty to talk about. And if the topic of your child comes up, be proud and open about it -- your positive feelings are sure to rub off on them.
All of that said, please do not pledge eternal devotion and undying passion to a man you've only known for two months, especially to his parents! Such a gesture will definitely unsettle both the parents and their progeny. Make it clear that you believe their son is a terrific person. But also make it clear that you and their son have to get much better acquainted before considering moving the relationship to a more serious level.
Good luck, and don't steal the silverware!
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