Mothers and Daughters: How to Improve Your Relationship and Find Yourself

Step 2: Talk to Your Mother about Self-Image and Beauty

Take a moment to respond to these statements in your journal:

  • One of the things I really like about being a woman is ...
  • One message about beauty or self-image I've received from my mother is ...
  • The physical qualities I've inherited from my mother are ...
  • One aspect of my mother's appearance I like is ...
  • One aspect of my appearance I like is ...
  • When I think about my body growing older, I ...
  • If I were easier on myself about the way I look, I'd ...
  • I get my sense of self-worth from ...
  • One thing I feel very strongly about regarding a woman's self-image and appearance is ...

Answering these questions will give you more insight into what you are and are not comfortable thinking about or talking about regarding your appearance. If you're like most other women, you probably found yourself thinking and feeling a variety of thoughts and emotions while answering those questions. You may realize that some of them are pleasant and some are not. Some of them will not even be your own, but instead, they're your mother's voice in your head. We don't often explore the thoughts behind our self-image, and when we do, we sometimes find out that what we thought was our issue is really our mother's issue. We notice that we have taken on beliefs from our mothers that no longer serve us. Or we find out just the opposite: Our mother's beliefs are sound, and we would do well to follow her advice now that we better understand our own perspective.

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