In addition to talking about visiting friends, I tried to create a little extra fun for those who stayed home. For example, when one of my daughters was invited to spend the night at a friend's house, my other three children got out their sleeping bags and had their own slumber party.
Occasionally other parents ask me beforehand if it is all right to invite just one of my children, and I let them know that I have already talked to my children about it and that individual invitations are fine. One time, though, a parent asked my children's kindergarten teacher about inviting one of my children to a birthday party, and the teacher without consulting me, warned the parent that the other children's feelings might be hurt. As a result, none of my children were invited to the party, and I regretted not talking to their teacher before this happened.
Having separate friends and going on individual outings has helped my quadruplets to establish their independence while they continue to have a close relationship with each other.
Reprinted with permission from Twin Services Reporter, Spring 1992, page 1. This article may be printed out for personal use but may not be reproduced in any other manner, including electronic, without prior written consent from Twin Services. For more information, call 510-524-0863.