Did everyone miss me? Good. Okay, I have a little Tom Cruise story for you.
While I was in L.A., I was staying with my friend Sarah in Beverly Hills. Funny enough, she lives right near Tom Cruise… so of course I made her take me to scope out his compound.
By the way, he rents it. It's about $30,000 a month and it's not in a secluded area at all. It's a stone's throw away from super busy Sunset Boulevard.
Anyway… As you can imagine, the place is a fortress and there are security cameras everywhere. Can't. See. A. Thing. So we're sitting outside his gate, laughing at the paparazzi lined up across the street and talking about how cool it would be if we got the $2 million dollar photos of the TomKitten when... the front gate opened.
Faster that you can say "Tom and Katie are going to end up getting divorced," Sarah and I looked at each other with dollar signs in our eyes. But, alas, no Suri. Out walked a 30-something year old guy carrying a box of what looked like golf club heads.
Perhaps something Tom uses for one of his Scientology rituals?
The next day, we were headed out to Malibu with my friend Tonya, who had to see casa Cruise before we set off on our excursion. Once again, we were sitting outside of Tom's for just a moment gawking... when the gate opened again.
Would this be my retirement money? I thought as I imagined how I'd spend my paycheck after selling the first baby Suri photos. No such luck. Another guy just exited the grounds and got into his car.
So, sadly, it's back to work for me