Photo Credit: Disney
Stars like Heidi Montag may believe that breast implants will get you farther in Hollywood. But they won't get you onto the set of Pirates of the Caribbean: On Stranger Tides -- because Disney is only considering actresses with all-natural cleavage for the fourth installment in their wildly successful swashbuckling franchise.
According to a casting call as reported in the New York Post, the fourth Pirates movie is seeking models with "lean dancer bodies" who are between 5'7" and 5'8", size 4-6 -- and they "must have real breasts." That's right, no bodacious boobs that were bought. (And rumor has it that actresses will have to submit to a "jogging test" to determine if their busts are the real deal!)
What's going on here? We're all in favor of actresses looking more real and less plastic, but it seems unlikely that Hollywood is suddenly embracing body-conscious feminism. So let's look at some possible theories:
Theory #1: They don't want the extras looking more voluptous than the leads.
Famously flat-chested Keira Knightly had to have cleavage painted on for previous Pirates films. But the new female lead is Penelope Cruz, who has more going on in that department, as a quick Google image search will prove. Next guess!
Theory #2: Audiences will be distracted by fake breasts.
This is the theory offered by the Times of London, which quotes one casting director: "Times are changing, and the audience can spot false breasts." But isn't everyone wearing decolletage-enhancing corsets anyway? And since when are the Pirates films realistic? Which brings us to our best guess...
Theory #3: They want natural breasts because the models are supposed to look identical.
Look at how specific the casting notice is -- they're seeking women of very similar height and weight, with the same body type. Plus, according to the Post, those interested are required to know how to dive and swim. Our guess: the roles actually being cast here are mermaids, or some other mythical species, and having some E-cup beauties in the mix would ruin the illusion.
An EW.com blogger has asserted that for many period films and costume dramas, it's routine to specify in casting notices that cosmetically-enhanced actresses are inappropriate. As much as the idea of blacklisting plastic-surgery addicts is refreshing, we suspect that Disney's motives are less idealistic and more practical. When we see a casting notice that specifies "no Botox patients" or "no extreme dieters" -- that's when we'll celebrate progress.
Plus: Heidi Montag Says No to More Plastic Surgery!
Is Disney wrong to seek non-cosmetically-enhanced actresses over those with impants, for a casting call? Chime in below!