Potty training required for advancement

My daughter is three and is having some difficulty with potty training. Unfortunately, her daycare center's policy is to retain the children in the baby/toddler room until they are fully potty trained. The director won't even allow her to occasionally visit the next level. I don't feel that my daughter is getting enough stimulation in her current setting. We are seriously considering removing her from this daycare center. What do you think?

Question:

Your daughter's daycare center has a policy about toilet training that could very likely contribute to her difficulty. If your daughter were in a class with children her own age, she would greatly benefit from seeing how other children use the bathroom. Very often this is a large contributor to a child's ability to potty train. The child sees that the other children don't fall in the toilet, that they don't mind flushing the toilet and that, once they are finished, they can easily go right back to play, without any taking off and putting on of clothes. These concerns, which are not necessarily important to parents, are issues of serious consideration for a child. In watching other children, a child can learn by imitating when he or she is physiologically ready to accomplish the task.

In my school, I don't require that any child be toilet trained. Some children train later than others, although almost every child can be trained by three-and-a-half. Still, there are children who, because of a physical lag or learning disability, are trained as late as four or five.

If your daycare center refuses to oblige you by placing your child in a room where she is with her peers, then it is definitely time to make the move. Tell your child that you are going to find another school, where she will be able to play with children her own age. Don't mention the toilet training: you don't want her to think she is being punished for not using the potty.

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