From Profiles to Emails: 25 Things Men Find Irresistible Online

Getting to that first face-to-face date

"I've usually initiated the first phone call, as well as the first meeting. But I see nothing wrong with a woman initiating. Everyone is on the site for essentially the same reason. Believe it or not, guys actually like to be pursued too. I would call that an ego thing. As far as who pays, I was always brought up with the understanding that it's up to the guy to pay, but that may not be the case with everyone."
--Jamie, 30, software sales account executive, NY

"Over email, I think it's difficult to know whether someone wants to meet up, so it's okay for the girl to suggest it if the guy doesn't. Just keep it simple. If you insist on dinner, be prepared to go Dutch, depending on the guy."
--Anthony, 43, online business development, NY

"Guys tend to like low-risk, no-promises engagements in this situation, ie, 'Let's just meet for a drink and see what happens.' This way no one is committed to an entire evening but the door is still open once we meet and get a feel for each other."
--Jamie, 30, software sales account executive, NY

"I usually end up paying for the date (another reason why I'm selective about who I actually end up going out with), but it's always nice of the woman to at least do 'the reach.'"
--Russ, 29, technology consultant, PA

What next? Chemistry questions and more...

"I've usually had a good indicator at the end of the date as to whether or not I would like to meet up with someone again. I am a firm believer in letting people know where they stand, so I usually let them know what I think right away. If I were interested I'd definitely ask her out again. If I were unsure I would probably give it another try, and if I weren't, I would let her know in a polite way. I expect the same from the women I meet."
--Jamie, 30, software sales account executive, NY

"If I'm not interested in a woman after our first meeting, I don't email her. Many times it's a simple case of not having chemistry, but other times it's an outright case of misrepresentation."
--Anthony, 43, online business development, NY

"This is a fun way to meet new people, and there is nothing wrong if you don't hit it off face to face. Everyone on the site has gone on dates or been married in the past, and the bottom line is that things obviously don't always work out. Same rules apply online."
--Jamie, 30, software sales account executive, NY

"I actually do feel that online dating can be romantic. But it's romantic for the same reason that dating is in real life. There are many women on each site, and though your search may bring up a couple hundred returns, there's only going to be one or two who really make your eyes open wide and make you say wow! When you get that first email back from them, it's definitely an awesome thing."
--Russ, 29, technology consultant, PA

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