Photo Credit: Courtesy of Bravo
On Sunday night, viewers got to drop back into the lives of Bravo's favorite, not-so-sweet Southern belles, The Real Housewives of Atlanta. What's in store for season 5? Well, if the premiere episode is any indication, a whole lot of crazy. Watch the full episode here:
In simple terms, NeNe Leakes is dining with an A-list TV producer, Kandi Burruss is in love and fixing up a McMansion, Kim Zolciak is pregnant again and possibly about to be evicted, Phaedra Parks is interviewing a vet and Cynthia Bailey is already sparring with the new girl, Kenya Moore. Of course, nothing's ever really simple with these women.
Who will win the prize for kookiest Housewife? NeNe Leakes still reigns supreme when it comes to creative insults, working one in about Kim's upbringing when describing her trailer on The New Normal set. (Yes, for those who aren't following Ms. Leakes' fast-moving career, she plays a character on Ryan Murphy's new sitcom about a gay couple going through the adoption process.) As she moves up in the world, NeNe appears totally disinterested in her ex-hubby, Gregg -- who wants her back. As they discuss a possible reunion, she points out some of his past infractions, but the real reason eventually comes out: "You have to get your sexy back," she says.
Later, she lunches with Murphy. "We're trying to find a great actor who could be your hot, studly, little brother," he tells her, suggesting Taye Diggs. "It's more like me being his younger sister," she says. The woman's a one-woman study in self-confidence.
Kim Zolciak's another Housewife who seems to be dancing to the Looney Tunes theme song. Together with Kroy Biermann, her husband and Sweetie, her assistant, she spends five minutes discussing what to do about their Roswell, Ga. home. "We thought we were buying this house at the end of the lease," she explains. But the house "appraised for a million less than the asking price…Even though it's my dream home it's just not smart to buy it."
But moving won't be easy, either. Not only will they have to find a new house, but it's possibly going to cost the couple over $100,000 to move and store their belongings while they do so. Upon hearing this, she tells Kroy to handle the mess, while she goes to lie down. "I can't even have a glass of wine to calm my nerves," she sighs. (She's preggers again, remember?) How long will the dim-witted but admirably hunky Kroy put up with this? Stay tuned, folks.
Phaedra Parks has been riding the crazy train for some time now, so it wasn't shocking to find her interviewing a local vet about her new business idea. "I don't want to limit my mortician practice to just people," she says. "I want to expand it to everything that can be buried." Including dogs. "I think people would love to have a fabulous celebration, a doggie bones send off," she tells the earnest, animal-loving vet. So when dogs die in the vet's care, she says, "make me your go-to girl." To her immense credit, the vet does not kick her on the way out the door.
No doubt the show's newest Housewife, Kenya Moore, would have. "I'm a tough girl," says this self-described "actor, producer, author and director" in a voiceover. "Don't let the boobatons fool you because I will beat a bitch down." Her primary nemesis this season looks to be Cynthia Bailey, the modeling agency honcho who asks Kenya to be a judge for Jet magazine's "Beauty of the Week" casting call. Kenya is rude throughout the process, scolding models for showing too much skin ("Just say no to crack") and insulting less attractive ones ("I'm not trying to be the mean girl, but why are you here?").
Cynthia is horrified by her poor manners and enraged by her attempt to monopolize the discussion. She reminds Kenya, a former Miss USA, several times that this is her modeling school. Naturally, Kenya's response is the assumption that Cynthia must be intimidated. Scenes from future episodes show NeNe and Kenya's first meeting. Clearly, Kenya is going to vie for NeNe's crazy crown. But will she dethrone her? Only time will tell.